In trying to establish just how irrelevant this website is, I decided to apply for press passes pretending I am a media outlet. I mean 40,000 people end up here every day, that may not be the 200,000 I once had but that means something…
Anyway, I figured that the new generation think I am irrelevant because the old generation think I am irrelevant, I have no influence, impact on anything, it’s not a big deal, it’s just how it is…..
So I applied for press passes to a Music Festival, not even something relevant like the Oscars, the Grammys, the American Music Awards…but some music festival and this is how it went down:
I wrote:
Will you give DrunkenStepfather.com press passes to your event so that I can dance on laps like old times?
DrunkenStepfather is the premiere worst site on the internet that NOBODY reads….
It makes no MONEY, therefore PRESS PASSES are necessary for me to get my DANCE on…
Don’t you want to see me dance?
You like seeing me dance, don’t you.
You sick fuck.
They responded:
Unfortunately we cannot credential you to cover the festival.
I wrote:
Due to your mean spirited rejection – I’ve lost all meaning, all purpose.
I feel so hurt….I feel so alone….I feel so irrelevant….
I feel like I don’t matter, like my website doesn’t matter, like 20 years of updating pop culture BULLSHIT in hopes that one day I’d be granted Press Passes has been a waste of my time.
Thanks to you, I’ve realized that uploading all that content to millions of loyal readers just doesn’t matter.
The music festival thinks I suck dick, but not in a good way, like the DJ whore sucking DJ dick to get in the VIP room…
The music festival thinks that I suck the kind of DICK so bad that it isn’t even worthy of getting into the press room….
I mean this rejection letter may be the worst rejection I’ve ever had….this may be the one that puts me over the edge.
My mom giving me up at the age of 10 to a foster family due to her HIV getting the best of her from a life of prostitution was pretty bad….BUT THIS…. THIS is unbearable.
I feel like my insides have been brutally ripped apart like that time I was in prison with that very aggressive man….only this time it is far less sexual…
YOU ARE MEAN
How do you LIVE with YOURSELF knowing how SNOBBY and MEAN you are.
I am sure deciding who the COOL kids are, who the RELEVANT kids are, like some kind of overlord of COOL makes you feel special and important….but the truth is YOU ARE A MONSTER!!
They should make HORROR movies about you….
“Attack of The Media Accreditation Email Person”…..STARRING YOU!
They never responded….it’s been weeks now….I don’t think they will…but there’s still a chance they will right….it’s like being a SIMP in a dating scenario….ONLY the truth is, I’m not going to a music festival even if I got the press passes….I’m lazy and old but it’s nice to be reminded that I don’t matter!
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^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
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