Although one would think my first love for South Africa is the high AIDS rate cuz shit just gets me all excited about the future of sex, not to mention gives me something to joke about when playing compare Paris Hilton’s Vagina to a Country games on long drives, the truth is my first love for South Africa is Charlize Theron….even though she escaped the shit and left her family behind after her mom shot her father to be all fancy and important in Hollywood….

She introduced me to the beautiful country when I was just an ignorant and uneducated 28 year old, and she was just a hot pussy in Playboy trying to make it in America, knowing like Kim Kardashian, Pam Anderson, and pretty much any relevant Hollywood actor with no family connections, that getting naked was the only way.

I respect that hustle and I think she’s kinda hot…so seeing her 40 year old hard nipples doesn’t quite get me as excited as hard nipples did when I was 14 in Gym class, but it’s good enough to get a post on this low grade, no standard website. Yay.

Posted in:Charlize Theron