A little under a decade ago, Charli XCX was some chubby UK popstar who came to America to make it. She was one of the popstars who always wore those leotards and was figuring out her act and persona. She had tours, that were probably just birthday parties and old folks homes, maybe the occasional mall, but nothing overly substantial. She did have a record contract and was worth millions of dollars, but I don’t know if she ever pulled her weight, her heavy heavy weight, but we did still stare at her tits, because that’s what we do when they give us these people to stare at and pretend are more important than us….these Entertainers…

Then covid hit and all of a sudden she’s got a new record, is livestreaming, has hit the fucking ground running like all her work has paid off. She sold her house in the UK, bought a new house in LA worth 20 million dollars, bitch was cruising and I guess still is….all thanks to singing whatever deal she signed with the devil.

Now the goth, who still has the tits, is still chubby, but obviously FAR more important than those early days in the leotard has gifted us with a topless pic, censored, but topless and that’s so much FUN….isn’t it….

I mean…if you’re going to go this far in posting this shit, release the fucking nip and get rid of the bullshit emoji. It’s patronizing and offensive to those of us who are only interested in this storyline because of the potential bare tit,…

Posted in:Charli XCX