I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Unsorted Category

2004

10

Dec

I am – Celeb Nipples

This is a quick post – on recent celeb nipples. I have no comments to add, other than the nipple is nature’s bottle…everytime I see tits I get all hungry and shit.

Bai Ling – Nipple Here
Charlotte Church – Topless Here
Lucy Becker – Topless and Implanted Here

I got these from the Taxi Driver Site….I will post it later.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

10

Dec

I am – Lindsay Lohan's Purse Finder

This is the story. Lohan loses her wallet, and now there are pictures of her “driver’s license” and her “black Amex”.

I didn’t post the images here, because I didn’t give a fuck. I still don’t but this is the story from the person who found the wallet and scanned the pictures

The only thing that stood out as interesting was the bag of white powder and the rolled up 20. Who cares, she does cock, get over it. IT’s only a big deal when she’s doin it off her stepfather’s cock….

This is the bullshit story

Hey Girls,

I just wanted to update you about our weekend in NYC. Of course it was Liz’s birthday so it was bound to be a crazy time…you know it’s never a dull moment when two or more of us P.C. girls get together! Well, for those of you who didn’t recieve a late night phone call Saturday night from Liz, I’ll fill you in on what happened…

When we got off the subway in Manhattan, me Liz and Charley were attempting to catch a cab when I saw something laying on the street… it looked like a wallet so I kicked it over to Charley and said “whats this?” Charley picked it up and we jumped into the cab. Inside the cab Charley opened the wallet and found a liscence, an American Express Black card, a $20 bill rolled tight, and a folded up $1 bill. He yells: “Oh my God, guess whos wallet this is!” I said: “Whos? I found it, hand it over!” To my surprise it was Lindsay Lohan’s California liscence and credit card! I took out the dollar bill and unfolded it to find a rather large bag of what looked to be cocaine! I couldnt believe my eyes! We had a pop star’s wallet with illegal drugs and she’s only 18!

The first thing that came to mind was to blackmail for a large amount of cash or a casting in her next movie… Unfortunately I’ve learned that publicity might not be so appealing when you have tons of strange people calling your cell phone to buy your story. Since I had no idea if I should keep the wallet or send it back, I called US Weekly for advice. US Weekly called Lindsays publicist and the next thing I knew I was getting calls from her publicist threatening to sue me. She wanted my home address so she can send a driver out to pick it up. I refused to give her any personal information. The National Inquirer called me about 8X to buy my story for $2500 (which keeps going up everytime I talk to them), they want to take pictures of the evidence, give me a polygraph, and interview me tomorrow. I dont think its the morraly correct thing to do and Im not sure its the safest either. the New York Post has attempted to contact me (check for an article in tomorrow’s paper, most likely it will not be a completely accurate story), the NYPD (who threatened to arrest me if i dont hand over the goods since they claim it is government property), and some strange people who wouldn’t even tell me who they were (but thought I was dumb enough to give them my address). I don’t know who to believe and what to do with the wallet. I told Lindsay’s publicist that I would like to return it to her in person so that I knew it was going to her. She said she would ask her. Supposedly Lindsay was freaked out by the whole thing and was crying hysterically and denied ever doing any drugs. The publicist told me she only drinks a lot and likes to party, and smokes cigarettes, but what 18 year old doesn’t…what a publicist she is! She also claimed to have called Lindsay’s parents who called their lawyer and is ready to sue me if I make any wrong moves.

At this point Im kind of afraid to answer my phone anymore b/c Im scared someone might get my address and come to my house. I think what I will do is just mail it to her house in Beverly Hills tomorrow and hope it gets to her. Anyway, I scanned the liscence and the credit card for you guys to see just for kicks. I blacked out her street address b/c I don’t know what kind of trouble I can get into and I have to be careful! The black card is cancelled, but it would have been nice to have a night of unlimited spending on Lindsay Lohan for Liz’s 24th birthday!

If you want to see the scans click
Here

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

10

Dec

I am – Lindsay Lohan’s Purse Finder

This is the story. Lohan loses her wallet, and now there are pictures of her “driver’s license” and her “black Amex”.

I didn’t post the images here, because I didn’t give a fuck. I still don’t but this is the story from the person who found the wallet and scanned the pictures

The only thing that stood out as interesting was the bag of white powder and the rolled up 20. Who cares, she does cock, get over it. IT’s only a big deal when she’s doin it off her stepfather’s cock….

This is the bullshit story

Hey Girls,

I just wanted to update you about our weekend in NYC. Of course it was Liz’s birthday so it was bound to be a crazy time…you know it’s never a dull moment when two or more of us P.C. girls get together! Well, for those of you who didn’t recieve a late night phone call Saturday night from Liz, I’ll fill you in on what happened…

When we got off the subway in Manhattan, me Liz and Charley were attempting to catch a cab when I saw something laying on the street… it looked like a wallet so I kicked it over to Charley and said “whats this?” Charley picked it up and we jumped into the cab. Inside the cab Charley opened the wallet and found a liscence, an American Express Black card, a $20 bill rolled tight, and a folded up $1 bill. He yells: “Oh my God, guess whos wallet this is!” I said: “Whos? I found it, hand it over!” To my surprise it was Lindsay Lohan’s California liscence and credit card! I took out the dollar bill and unfolded it to find a rather large bag of what looked to be cocaine! I couldnt believe my eyes! We had a pop star’s wallet with illegal drugs and she’s only 18!

The first thing that came to mind was to blackmail for a large amount of cash or a casting in her next movie… Unfortunately I’ve learned that publicity might not be so appealing when you have tons of strange people calling your cell phone to buy your story. Since I had no idea if I should keep the wallet or send it back, I called US Weekly for advice. US Weekly called Lindsays publicist and the next thing I knew I was getting calls from her publicist threatening to sue me. She wanted my home address so she can send a driver out to pick it up. I refused to give her any personal information. The National Inquirer called me about 8X to buy my story for $2500 (which keeps going up everytime I talk to them), they want to take pictures of the evidence, give me a polygraph, and interview me tomorrow. I dont think its the morraly correct thing to do and Im not sure its the safest either. the New York Post has attempted to contact me (check for an article in tomorrow’s paper, most likely it will not be a completely accurate story), the NYPD (who threatened to arrest me if i dont hand over the goods since they claim it is government property), and some strange people who wouldn’t even tell me who they were (but thought I was dumb enough to give them my address). I don’t know who to believe and what to do with the wallet. I told Lindsay’s publicist that I would like to return it to her in person so that I knew it was going to her. She said she would ask her. Supposedly Lindsay was freaked out by the whole thing and was crying hysterically and denied ever doing any drugs. The publicist told me she only drinks a lot and likes to party, and smokes cigarettes, but what 18 year old doesn’t…what a publicist she is! She also claimed to have called Lindsay’s parents who called their lawyer and is ready to sue me if I make any wrong moves.

At this point Im kind of afraid to answer my phone anymore b/c Im scared someone might get my address and come to my house. I think what I will do is just mail it to her house in Beverly Hills tomorrow and hope it gets to her. Anyway, I scanned the liscence and the credit card for you guys to see just for kicks. I blacked out her street address b/c I don’t know what kind of trouble I can get into and I have to be careful! The black card is cancelled, but it would have been nice to have a night of unlimited spending on Lindsay Lohan for Liz’s 24th birthday!

If you want to see the scans click
Here

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

09

Dec

I am – Statutory Rapist of the Day

This is our new feature. We have lots of features.

Statutory Rapist of The Day is: Jeffrey A. Campbell, 51,

Jeff is accused of having sex with a 16-year-old employee inside the SRO Frozen Custard shop. I think frozen custard is ice cream

Statutory Rapists look like this

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

09

Dec

I am – Bubbles Butt Boosters

Does your girl have a saggy or a skinny ass? Do you? Bubbles is the new must-have jeans accessory that holds your ass up for you..no workout needed.

I love this shit…I have a skinny ass but im more worried about my bulge

I need a cock booster. Im sure there is one out there. Help us find it!

Sorry fat chicks..Bubbles isnt for you! Duct tape is.

See Bubbles Here

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

09

Dec

I am – eGay

Meet Little John, Farmer Brown and a gay goat

Heavy Petting?
Gay?
Illegal?

You decide

Click here

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

09

Dec

I am – Chrismukkah Yarmaclaus

OC jews are funny,
They celebrate Chrismukkah
Cohen is a nerd, chicks dig him
He wears motif sweaters
Sandy is a Pimp with good hair
Kiki is from Montreal

I shop at the Ocinsider.com
I bought a Chrismukkah Yarmaclaus to please everyone

You should buy one too…unless your friends are muslim and sihks, in that case you would need a kufi-turbin…you won’t find those at the OC shop. In fact, you probably won’t find any in California..

Buy HERE

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

09

Dec

I am – Post Mortem Celebrity Stalker

This week on the drunkenstepfather auction watch is a hollywood cemetery crypt

To all celebrity stalkers: Purchase this hollywood cemetery crypt and lay yourself to rest inches away from dead celebs like Marilyn Monroe, Rodney Dangerfield, Dean Martin, Donna Reed, Jack Lemon, Walter Mathau…along with a neverending list of B-actors…

So I guess celebrity stalking has reached a whole new level. Im all for it…I think I would feel better about being dead knowing that my bones will dry out in good company..

Bid Now

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

09

Dec

I am – Fetus

I saw this on WTFPeople.com
It’s fucking sick
I don’t even want to talk about how fucking sick this is
But I will…
It reminds me of the time my ex wife miscarried, dumb bitch was smokin crack rock and I told her not to. I was like “do you want a flipper baby” … anyway – we don’t have to worry about her, she is a hooker now, not classy escort, just a good old fashion street whore.

this link is sick – extreme warning – do not click it.

HERE

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2004

09

Dec

I am – Dead

Sad Story
Guitarist of Pantera
Shot while performing
I don’t know what to say about this, other than death sucks… more than Pantera’s music
And killing people sucks harder than I did in prison
what was i arrested for? Let’s just say an incident that happened while babysitting!

Here

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted