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Archive for the Jordan Category




I am – Pregnant Jordan Leaves Piercing Studio of the Day


Jordan was seen going to a Piercing Studio yesterday. I can only assume that she got the barbell that was holding her mangled vagina together and keeping the baby inside was taken out because bitch is ready to job. I could be wrong though, her boyfriend is pretty fucking cheesy looking and is definitely the kind of guy with a belly button ring or whatever else you cha chi guido lookin’ motherfuckers with your slicked back hair are doing these days…..

I pissed off a girl I talk to by telling her that the only vagina worth hanging out with is one that is an inny not an outty. I was just doing it to be an asshole and she took it really personally and stopped talking to me. I already know that inny vaginas don’t exist and if they do, they are on fat chicks. I gave up on the quest for a coinslot about 3 years ago, but girls are still really insecure about not having the box of an 8 year old that they think they are supposed to have with all their waxing and labia reduction surgeries and shit….

They should just do what Jordan does, overcompensate with retardedly huge tits.

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I am – Jordan is the Mum of the Year of the Day


I guess ready to drop porn has always had a place in the world. I can remember talking to people over the years about how they wanted to slam pregnant chicks. I remember a local magazine shop that only really had porn because that’s just the part of town I live in had about 15 pregnant slut porno mag titles. I was never into it because it the thought of a baby growing inside a slut kinda grosses me out. I can only assume that the kind of girl who fists herself on camera while pregnant, probably didn’t get pregnant doing something I’d find sexy. But I am pretty prude when it comes to my smut.

But that’s not the point, the point is one day I saw this 15 year old kid outside the magazine shop, he had been rejected when buying a Hustler and told me this story about how his dad left the family and that he had to teach his 12 year old brother about sex. He begged me to pick up a Hustler for him and I said ok, because I have no real morals, took his 10 dollars and picked up the dirties pregnant porno I could find. I bought myself a pack of smokes and gave him his magazine, gave him a pat on his back and said tell your brother to use a condom or his bitch will end up like this and walked away. I like to think of myself as a man of the people teaching kids the things they need to learn.

Either way, Jordan won some “Mum of the Year” bullshit award because she has a retarded half black half bucket of rocks of a son that got that way from her insane partying while pregnant antics and is now is knocked up with a second kid she can’t breast feed for fear of giving him some kind of retardation from silicone poisoning. So giving her this award is like letting me babysit your teenage daughters…

My posts are boring today, but you win some and you lose some, I have just never won any yet…but pregnant or not, I’d still bang Jordan, I know I have no standards, but she’s hotter than anything I’ve had even with a baby up in her diseased womb…

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I am – Jordan is a Pregnant Whore of the Day


When I asked my friend, if you can call a dude with a babe blog who lives on a sheep farm in the UK a friend, who Jordan was this is what he said to me:

Jordan is Katie Price and she was a page three girl. She had multiple boob jobs, did a sex tape with a guy in a boyband, had a blind waterhead of a baby with a footballer, wrote a best selling book, has an underwear collection and married a popstar…if you can call THIS being a popstar….

Point of this post is that if you are a slutty lookin’ whore of a woman from the UK, figure out a way into Page 3 and become a fake useless celebrity that the tabloids fall in love with. That page 3 feature will get you famous enough to get into any club you want and that success will land you the admiration of every useless f-list celebrity man frequenting the same clubs who like fucking girls with massive fake tits and lots of unnecessary media attention who together may make their way to the d-list.

Point being that it sure beats being a GoGo dancer at the shittty bar in your shitty town…Here she is a few years later, knocked up like the slut she is from a new baby daddy, cuz that’s how a classy career carries a person into a promising future.

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