This has got to be some kind of joke. I mean sure I’d marry Mischa Barton because I know she’s going to die soon, or at least that she’d be easy to manipulate into doing things for me, like buying me stuff and getting me into open-bar events, but I’m not really that picky when it comes to wifes, I just need to make sure the rent will be paid so that I don’t have to work, and whether they are fat, dirty and smell like they are rotten partially because they don’t believe in wiping their asses after taking sloppy malnourished shits, but also because they forgot a tampon inside them 6 months ago and haven’t been alert enough to realize it, I’m not complaining….but if I was a marketing person at a briday store, this would be the first person I would ask to “step away from the dress”, I mean other than Jessica Simpson, but that’s only because Jessica Simpson is fucking desperate…and could end up in some crazed rage, where as Mischa Barton just stains the shit and makes it unsellable, which is less dangerous..not that you care….or that I care…I mean seeing a bitch living out the fairy tale wedding she may never have thanks to impending death is nice…I mean maybe she’s out shopping for the dress she wants to be buried in, for when she marries God in heaven or something, who fucking knows….I just know she looks horrible…but maybe zombie brides get you off….and I’m just gonna post this, and ignore the fact that I posted this, cuz even I don’t understand why I did this…but I did it…

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Posted in:Deathwatch|Mischa Baron|Wedding Dress