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Archive for the Reunion Category

2008

04

Apr

New Kids on the Block Together Again of the Day

People love the New Kids on the Block. Here they are making their first public appearance at the Today show, dressed in suits instead of like the fags they used to and I assume that all the middle aged women out there have their dildos out celebrating this whole New Kids reunion and this is going to go on for the next month until NKOTB release their song and perform live. I am pretty sure that this has tapped into their youth in a way that nothing ever really has, not even the night they hit the bong like they were in high school and that when they go home tonight after working doing whatever 35 year old women do, they are going jump their husbands like it was their wedding night and that is the power of New Kids on the Block.

When I was about 16 and pretty fresh into the country, I was banging a fat chick. I was fuckin’ her because she was always ready to bang, always had food in her fridge and can be credited as being the reason that I continued to fuck fat chicks well into my 30s, because fat chicks are always willing to fuck, in fact she is probably the reason I am the mess I am in today after marrying a fat chick when I should have just taken her out for donuts, we’d both be a lot happier now….

Either way, she made me go to the New Kids on the Block Hanging Tough tour with her and her little sister. It was my first concert that I had ever gone to and I actually had a good time. I was familiar with some of their songs and sang along with my patent leather shoes but that was before knowing it was gay as fuck and that I deserved to get beat up by the jocks everytime I wore a New Kids on the Block t-shirt to school. Realize that I had never seen pussy in that quantity of that quality screaming and cumming their fucking pants for a bunch of guys. In my mind I had just been like a terrorist after suicide bombing a school walking into the promised land of 15,000 – 20,000 virgins and in my mind New Kids on the Block will always be some kind of god to me……

Posted in:New Kids on the Block|Reunion

2007

04

May

I am – Spice Girl Reunion of the Day

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So I’ll Tell You What I Want, What I Really Really Want, and that’s for the Spice Girls to go back in time and look like they used to . I know that aging is all part of life, otherwise we’d never get old and life would be all Peter Pan pedophile shit, but looking at them now, all post pregnancy or currently pregnant brings back pretty vivid drunken memories of me trying to jerk off to their music videos. I guess what I am trying to say is that life ends for a chick after she gives birth, her body goes to shit and she should probably do whatever she can to stay out of the public eye as much as possible, because sometimes it’s nice for us to remember the good times, and not be forced to witness the demise…Sure, I can respect that having a family and creating life and all that shit is beautiful in theory, but no one ever said it makes you pretty and I have little interest is seeing a once tight bodied Scary Spice’s Eddy Murphey induced cellulite. That’s all I have to say about that.

On a side note, I have no idea what they are doing hanging out together, I can only assume they are going to try to cash in on being mom’s by launching some children’s album or some shit, but they are probably more like the moms who meet at my starbucks after doing mommy yoga together, to discuss how amazing life is and how having a baby changed their life forever, setting up a life of competing amongst friends about which kid is the best and laughing at their single friend who is still going out every night and fucking random men trying to fill that void…..At least they are doing it dressed like sluts….

Posted in:Emma Bunton|Geri Halliwell|Ginger Spice|Mel B|Melanie Brown|Reunion|Unsorted