I know you don’t give a shit about this guy, but someone sent in this email and since he’s a hot item right now, decided I’d post it. Sure he doesn’t have tits, but he probably gets a lot of tits, becaue this Twilight shit is fuckin’ crazy. I know 18 year old girls who have told me it has changed their lives, have told me they have masturbated reading it, and by default, that makes this Rob Pattinson a heart throb, but with eyebrows liek that, he looks more like he’s got a hipster’s pussy on his head, because hipsters think it’s cool and artistic to no shave their pussies…

Anyway, I got this email along with the pic….

i have a funny picture for you of robert pattinson

i hung out with him in portland a bunch when he was filming

yeah, not so cute

Right….I am sure the second you saw him in the bar and found out what he was doing there and who he was, you didn’t care about his fucking eyebrows, but instead jumped on his dick, but now that he’s not returning your calls, because every girl in the world is trying to get on his dick, he doesn’t have time to return his calls from the slut in Portland who to him seemed so long ago, but to you, it’s the highlight of your fucking life. I could be wrong. It happens, but I do appreciate the pic and I’d never wrong you like he did baby….

Oh, and the fact that the only exclusives I get are of some guy I’ve never heard of because I don’t like vampire movies or little wizard kid movies and his eyebrows, depresses the fuck out of me. Where’s the Lohan sex tape, or the Spencer Pratt getting fisted by Montag video….Come on people..Get it together…

Posted in:Eyebrows|Robert Pattison