The Lindsay Lohan Deathwatch isn’t going so well because she’s still alive. Sure she’s at a club drinking “red bull” and maybe that shit, coupled with the blow, will jack her weakened heart into some kind of cardiac arrest that leaves her foaming from the mouth in the DJ booth while Sam Ronson drops some greatest hits from today and yesterday like she was some kind of adult contemporary radio station, but Lohan’s smiling in these pics, and smiles are not condusive to someone shitting their eyeballs out of them and leaving a bloody Ebola mess all over the bathroom floor, you know someone on the verge of death. Smiles mean happiness and happiness does not mean impending death. We’ll keep waiting…

Posted in:Death Watch|Lindsay Lohan