The fact that Hayden Panettiere has this weird cult following of virgin fan boys is weird to me, but not as weird as when I visualize her getting fucked by her 6 foot 6 boxing champion boyfriend, who could have a mico-penis, making it a comical clown car experience, something Hayden the circus freak is probably used to, but who could just easily have a massive cock that breaks her in half, reminding her of a time when her mom used her in a sex ring as a child, the way her vagina likes it.
Well, turns out they are getting married…because that’s what people do for some weird reason I’ll never understand, much like how I will never understand how Hayden has a fan base.
BUT I FIGURED I’D USE THIS OPPORTUNITY TO POST
MY HAYDEN PANETTIERE ARCHIVE OF BIKINIS, BRAS, MIDGET JOKES
I like making things about myself like that….
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