I used to fuck an engaged girl who looked a bit like Natalie Portman, so every time I see a picture of Natalie Portman, I remember fucking this Jewish girl unprotected up the ass while her engagement ring reflected the light her cell phone was casting on it as her soon to be husband would be calling her to find out where she was – to ask why she wasn’t home – and all that other fun stuff that comes with cheating….

I also think about how Natalie Portman is iconic in the Jewish world – because it proves a Jewish woman can be really hot and it gives the Jewish men reason to become billionaires to seduce this grade of Jewish women – so that they don’t have to end up with the fat one who runs her dad’s deli….it’s a cultural thing…

In a triple threat, Portman is ALSO a Star Wars character and that sets you up with the weirdest fucking people to follow you through life, so seeing her in this red dress promoting bullshit…is pretty nice..

Posted in:Natalie Portman|SFW