These are pictures of Cameron Diaz leaving Paris Hilton’s house completely wasted. probably because both these sluts were sitting around discussing how they became washed up useless celebrities no one cares about in such a short time. It feels like just last week that Paris Hilton was making guys horny with sex tapes and nip slips at every event in Hollywood, while Cameron Diaz was slamming Justin Timberlake, giving her this false sense of desirability, because he was the hottest thing in music and was going home to her, but now she realizes that he was just in a depression and she was the trash that he ended up with cuz she was available and his guard was down, but now he’s out owning every hot vagina he comes across while she sits at Paris’ house drinking away her pain….

Either way, drunk chicks are pretty fucking cool, I haven’t really slammed a girl who wasn’t drunk, making booze a pretty important in getting laid. But bitches who I meet on the street publicly drunk, pissing on bus shelters and screaming at people walking by them, are just too fucking sloppy to take home, so you just have to convince them to let you slam them in a back alley around the corner while they try not to throw up all over the place. I remember that I had some other stories to write about but passed out on my second hand stained couch when I was trying to crop these pictures last night at 4 am and only woke up now. It’s safe to say that I suck at life.

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