the tables have turned.
no longer can i declare what is commonly known as holy war on guilty bystanders,
because my time has come to get knocked.
this morning, at breakfast, innocently eating my 7 pub style chicken fingers,
my step mother walks in and tells me i am eating the wrong fingers,
i grabbed her fist and attempted to take a bite but as my delightfully unmanicured hands grabbed her horribly manicured hands, she yelped, i stopped,
resorted to eating my own fingers, thank you VERY MUCH.
as i got up, mid meal with my fingers in between my un-lipsticked lips,
dodging plates, plants and fried matzoh (which was being aimed at me, even though i was EATING-
anyways i was getting ready to walk up the stairs to go back into bed (current time, 2 pm) when nanny screams “you look like shit, take a shower and put some makeup on!”
to which i yelled back,
with a fist which pierced through the air
like a proud beacon of my beliefs
“I AM AGAINST MAINTENANCE!”
and crept back under the covers, with my fingers.

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