This is a hot fucking shirt and I don’t care if she’s got a fire crotch, I take what I can get. Does it remind you of that time you went on that vacation to the beach with the girl you wanted to spend the rest of your life with? You know the time you found that private part of the beach and frolicked around, tanning in each others arm, just like that scene in Cocktail where they go to the waterfall, don’t pretend you don’t know what I am talking about. I know you never went on that trip, and the last time you spoke to a girl who wasn’t a relation was a while ago, but at least you haven’t jumped off the bridge yet… I understand that we all like to be loved, we like to think that one day we will actually be in bed with someone we want to be in bed with, not our fat wife who takes up half the bed, not because she sprawls out, but because of the sheer size of her. Anyway – it doesn’t matter…point is this t-shirt is hot.

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