I have never really looked into Lohan’s genealogy, but I have a feeling she’s a Jew. The main reason is because she’s from Long Island and everyone in Long Island is Jew but she also works in entertainment and all people in entertainment are Jews, except for the black people but no one notices them because they make really bad/obnoxious movies. She’s also a bit of a whiner and she’s railin’ yay like it’s going out of style, something only rich jewish kids do and she’s also been hospitalized 10 times in the last year, something Jews do, because they go see specialists for every fucking everyday symptom of disease. The defining Jew moment was when I saw these pics where she’s rockin’ a Jew outfit. If you are a Jewish girl, you’ll know what I am talking about…..

Bonus – Michelle Trachtenberg’s Jew Outfit

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