I am - Long Weeked on the Beach of the Day

2006

Jul

I am – Long Weeked on the Beach of the Day

I guess there’s no real argument that this is the best place to get celeb paparazzi pics, because you get to read my stories while looking at the pictures. All the other sites suck and the logic is that no one really cares about what the celebs are actually up to and who they are fucking. All we want is to see pictures of them fucking, in bikinis and living their useless lives. We want to talk about hookers, naked girls, drug addictions and impotency, or what I like to call, the issues that shape our lives. We are all self absorbed fuckers and the only ppl who care if Britney and K-Fed are getting a divorce are 15 year old girls, gay men (Trerez PinkSuit is the New Hilton) and housewives. I know I don’t care whether Keira Knightly has a PMS playlist, or if Lohan will be in Turks and Caicos for her birthday. That’s probably part of the reason why I am not jerking off to Ryan Phillippe’s abs. The point of all this is to say that you are a lucky 500 people to be a part of something this special and while other sites get their millions of visitors and 5 minutes of fame on VH1, we have each other. So you are all useless readers and I am never going to make money off this shit, meaning I am not chilling on the fucking beach, I may never see another fucking beach in my lifetime. I am okay with that. In honor of being in a one room shitty apartment that houses 4 people with no food in the fridge, no money in the bank, I give you a bunch of celebrities on the beach. In my shitty life, I don’t have to go to the beach, I got all these cunts doin it for me. Cuddles.

UMA THURMAN