I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2006

11

Jul

I am – Victoria Beckham’s White Pants of the Day

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Sometimes I wake up at 2 pm, fully clothed on the floor of my kitchen with salsa dried up on my face. Those are the days where I feel like this site is a huge waste of my fucking time, and I know you guys are annoyed of my bitching about how much I suck, but it’s kinda what I do. I am not depressed or hating on myself, I am just bored of this shit. There’s nothing happening, the site’s less popular than it was last year, I make no money, and I hate celebrity shit. I haven’t made out with Lohan or been invited to any celebrity parties. I emailed American Apparel once for an ad deal and they never returned my call.

Maybe that’s the problem, I am posting on shit I don’t care about, just trying to get traffic. But then, I sober up and realize, I really have nothing better to do with my time. Kinda like this slut Beckham. She made her money 10 years ago and since Spice Girls, hasn’t done shit and by shit I mean have 5 babies. The difference between me and Beckham is that I am 300 lbs, mexican, poor and unaccomplished, but other than that, we’re kinda the same person. That’s the story I heard. Now go fuck yourself. Thanks in advance.

Bonus: Victoria Beckham with her Kids….and by Kids I Mean Tits

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