I have no idea who Kate Beckinsale is because I don’t really keep up to date on this shit. I guess you shouldn’t even waste your time reading this because I am a bit of a hack and no one really cares what a hack has to say. I do know that she is having a good time on the beach with a man and that means she must be a slut. Looking at her frolick on the beach like she just won the fucking lottery and that her life is so fucking perfect makes me hate her as I type this useless post on her in my shitty apartment.

I went on a walk last and ended up in a back alley downtown… I heard some weird moaning that sounded like homeless people fucking or dying in an empty park. I am usually more investigative like Barbara Walters but I knew that if these stinky motherfuckers were having a homeless man orgy, I would probably get sick by the smell and the AIDs. I also went window shopping for shoes on this walk and got stopped by the cops. He asked me if I was buying shoes for my girlfriend, and I told him that my wife was too fat for shoes and wore knitted slippers that we got at a church Bazaar. He didn’t laugh, I guess he knew I wasn’t lying and felt bad for me. Either way, here is some Beckinsale. Old or new, I don’t know, but here never the less.

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