I just got back from a shitty Karaoke bar. There were about 20 people up in the place. One inter-racial couple that were making out so hard that I thought I was in a porno for ugly people. The little Asian girl was actually riding the dude in the place while their friends butchered song after song. The highlight of the night was when three fat chicks sitting in the corner were picked up by 3 drunken punks drinking bud light. One of the girls got up on stage with her mom jeans and $25 practical shoes while singing a No Doubt song and keeping her rhythm by tapping on her hips and dancing like a fool. Then the dude who was pickin’ her up got up and dedicated a song to the hip tapper, that song was rent, probably a bad move considering showtunes are gayer than bicycle shorts and Rent is all about AIDs. Probably not the best first date topic, unless your first date is with a guy you met at the gay bath house. He killed that song like he gave it AIDs and like he was Justin Timberlake, but this karaoke bar is probably the closest thing he’ll ever have to being famous.

Speaking of Karaoke and being almost famous, here are the Ashlee Simpson Bikini Pics for you to look at while I practice for next week.

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