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I am – Megan Fox is a Skater Girl Who Dates Assholes of the Day


I was sitting on a park bench yesterday and saw some hot teenage girl who was probably skipping high school classes rockin’ a pair of skinny jeans like she was a Ramone, and a pair of massive high top shoes like she was Michael Jordan. It reminded me of when I used to drink with kids at the skate park in the 90s when the groupie girls would dress like that to get the skater kids dick in their mouths. I was just the drunk old guy in the corner they wanted nothing to do with, but I did convince one of them to masturbate for me in exchange for a bag of meth, but she was kinda fat and that’s how I pushed the shit on her, I was like I got this miracle weight loss meds….she fell for it like a fat kid who doesn’t want to be fat on weight loss miracles.

Anyway, Megan Fox reminded me of those days, with her matching shirt and shoelaces, but I don’t really know who this bitch is and I don’t really care, I just know that she’s fighting with her boyfriend in these pics, which is totally fine by me because of his frat boy, gangbang with his football friend, massively gay ironic T-shirt and his whiney bitch ways, like how he storms off from the fight all flustered like Megan Fox is the one who straps it on for him….

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