So it seems like Lohan’s fallen off the wagon or is at least about to fall off the wagon and that gets me excited because she’s going to be more accessible. I don’t actually think she’s ever been on a wagon, but that’s only because her parents turned her into a money making machine when she was a kid and when you’re a money making machine, there’s not time to play and also because I am sure the rehab center she was at were letting her do whatever fucking drugs she wanted because she was a great marketing tool for them.

That said, she’s back with the Lesbian Cock Ronson and where there’s lesbian cock there’s cocaine, especially when that lesbian cock is a bad DJ, because she needs that shit to get the confidence to go on stage and make a fool of herself without realizing it. Powdered Courage baby…you should try it.

Bonus: Steve Aoki – Lohan’s Homey is in some videogame and it made me laugh

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