If you’re wondering why I am so slow moving today, it’s because there’s a huge snowstorm here and the roads are fuckin’ shit. Traffic everywhere and it put a damper on me walking my half naked fat body from my bed to the chair I sit on all day. I’m a pussy like that.
Speaking of vagina, here are some pictures of Tara Reid in a bikini, and it can only assumed that her pussy smells like whiskey and that is a huge turn on for me. Tara Reid is one of those drunks who can keep shit together, because her job isn’t really a job, since she hasn’t worked in a long time, when the rest of us with real jobs always end up getting caught wasted and then fired, not that I have a real job, but a boy’s allowed to pretend, this is the Internet. That doesn’t mean I respect her for holding it together but she’s kinda like a hero to drunk people everywhere.
I am into Tara Reid because I think she looks good compared all the drunken chicks I’ve come across. I like skinny blonde chicks who are drunk, but that’s just because a common theme in my sex life was that I could only fuck fat drunk girls with slopy tits, so she’d be a step up. Her fake tits aren’t as offensive as the ones I can afford to grab at the strip club, making her a potential candidate for my K-Fed retirement plan, because anyone who can afford to travel the world with a purse handler and spend her days in bikinis can afford to support me but that’s because I’m pretty cheap.
I have no idea why she’s wearing 2 different bikinis, but I can only assume it’s because she shit herself. It happens.