So this picture was sent in by a reader claiming they were pictures of Michael Phelps, which I thought was surprising because I heard he was some awkward Jewish lookin’ kid with no friends who was found in a dumpster after being left they by his teenage mother at prom and was sent into some US military genetic program instead of an orphanage and was cross bread animals to make super humans or some shit, because winning the olympics for a competitive country that wants to be the best in the world on all fronts a priority and I beleived it because I have seen this fucker swim on TV at the bar and that shit is just not natural.

When I was growing up, the kids on the swim team were all these horny, half naked losers, the guys would constantly pop boners for the girls and the girls were always kinda fat and forced into it by there parents and it was some kind of perverse freakshow of a group that always smelled like chemicals and who were only accepted by each other, so I find the whole celebrating them now because they are on some Olympic global platform is just as lame as the kids who would go watch the swim meets on a Saturday beause they had nothing better to do with themselves. Swimming competitively has never been cool, swimming naked has always been cool and I find it annoying that all these useless sports are suddenly popular because you have some hero in the shit, doesn’t mean shit.

What I don’t find annoying is that Phelp’s mom lets men take pictures of her in her lingerie, not that this is actually her, but ya never know, it could be.

Posted in:Michael Phelps|Mom