I met a girl this weekend who was talking about her boyfriend and how obsessed he was with Miley Cyrus. He thought she was so fucking hot and that she caught him jerking off to pictures of her online on more than one occassion. Which amazed me because I found it weird, maybe because I think she’s a fucking disaster with a wonky inbred face….I guess he just liked the whole young girl pretending she’s a virgin act, so I asked her if he ever insisted on putting ketchup inside her while they fuck to simulate de-virginization, because as a man who has never banged or wanted to bang a virgin in his life, I can’t really relate, see I only likes my pussy tainted like the meat at the ghetto grocery store cuz tainted means affordable….needless to say, that girl I met on the weekend didn’t want to become friends….but apparently Miley’s vagina wants to become friends with every cock around…I guess that’s what Disney execs only allowing you to do oral all these years will do to a motherfucker…and here she is keeping it wholesome with her muffin top….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Miley Cyrus|Muffin top