I think Jennifer Lopez’s biggest achievement besides making a lot of money from nothing, or so she claims, but I think fucking celebrity dudes, counts for coming from something, if making it in entertainment is your hustle….if you know what I mean….is her ability to be a hispanic mother of two and not, despite everything her genes want her to be doing, is not 500 pounds and in line at walmart buying pork rinds….

I think the biggest lie about J.Lo was that her ass was ever anything amazing like a Kardashian, but more importantly, that she was the most Beautiful woman last year, coinciding with an album release, in what we call an ADVERTORIAL with People magazine…

But if you’re like me and love looking at middled aged women in SPANX, hoding their shit together, by looking up their skirts…Then this J.Lo’s for you…..otherwise, you’re better off looking at whatever is growing in Katy Perry’s uterus trying to crawl out of her but getting stuck in her Pantyhose..upskirt… .that I posted earlier…

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