Irina Shayk is pretty much the best body there is…..a Russian unknown model turned SI cover girl in some KGB operation to defend Ronaldo’s homosexuality using her as an amazing front….who also has an amazing back (you see what I did there)….well now she’s getting all kinds of big model jobs like she never had to wait in line for rationed bread….and I’m totally down with staring at her…while mourning the fact that she’s a pornstar that never was….because watching this amazing thing fuck…would probably be glorious to everyone but Ronaldo…who resents her for not having testicles….every night they spend together fronting he’s straight.

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