The most tragic thing about Emily Didonato is that she has rumored to have had sex with Jake Gyllenhaal.

But I guess despite hating Jake Gyllenhaal, I know he’s a homo at his core, and probably doesn’t even have sex with her, but instead makes her shove things in his ass, when they aren’t shopping or talking about his hair. That’s just how fucked up egos work.

I mean maybe he does her ass after harnessing her up with prosthetic testicles, but I’m gonna tell myself that their relationship is just jokes for publicity, until he proves otherwise with sex tapes.

Because that way, I can look at her and objectify her, without hating her for having such poor judgement while acting like a groupie.

Posted in:Emily DiDonato