Someone asshole was knocking on my door at 8 am, so in my hungover state I assumed it was a stalker out to kill me, but instead of hiding in the basement until they went away, as I normally do, I scoped out the scene…they looked like police investigators, or maybe some FBI motherfuckers and I thought – maybe this is my big break to get taken away from my prison I’ve created with a fat wife…TAKE ME IN FOR QUESTIONING…
But before I could get my pants on, they started to walk away..and I saw my opportunity walking away with them…so I ran after then only to find out they were actually jehovah witness doing the rounds…
I think I am the only motherfucker who chases after jehovah witnesses…in the history of jehovah witnesses doing the rounds…
I guess they didn’t blacklist me for the time I pulled out my erection and invited two of the girls soliciting their bullshit in…
Here are some morning links…I am still hungover…but I know why bad things happen to good people according to the scripture thanks to my new friends…and the reason bad things happen to good people is simple…bad things happen to everyone…
Here are some morning links….
Mirror Selfies
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Chicken / Human Eye Swap
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Lana Del Ray Did Complex
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No Name in a White Bikini
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Nicki Minaj Defends Her Ass
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Selena Gomez Panty Flash
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Ray Rice Knocks Out His Fiance
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Kid Rock’s Dildo Subpoenaed
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FIND COUGARS TO FUCK – BECAUSE COUGARS ARE HORNY!!
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Bets You Will Always Win
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WATCH GIRLS – YOUNG GIRLS – ALL GIRLS – AMAZING GIRLS
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Batman’s Butt Chin
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13 Pics of Insects Fucking
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