If you figure out a way to manipulate your way to America from Australia through “modeling” and marrying an actor who at the time was very relevant…and with that new found celebrity status secure a contract with a massive brand that at the time was very relevant in terms of the models they chose because instagram didn’t exist and we were forced to go to them for our catalog porn when feeling nostalgic…only to get fired for fucking an 18 year old popstar, ruining her marriage….and leaving her to find for herself in this cold dark rich person world…navigating her way through billionaires…until finally settling on a young one who founded Snapchat and is at the peak of his relevance…while she’s fallin’ off and not just as an inadequate mother who always puts her kids in the kennel, but in her career….

You know…just a gold digging prostitute who has the ability to charge and not feel like a prostitute due to modeling…

The above picture would be your view….

If you’re the gold owner…this would be your view…I mean the PG version before you really get what you pay for…

Posted in:Miranda Kerr|SFW