I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2019

25

Nov

Hilary Duff – Scary in Bike Shorts of the Day

Here’s some Lance Armstrong looking shit, only with more balls, you know since Lance Armstrong, like the founder of Burton Snowboards, and probably all of us who use lap tops and keep cellphones in our pockets, have testicular cancer…

The plastic faced 30 years old in the bike shorts, who doesn’t realize that nothing is gayer than bike shorts, because it’s a trend now….looks substantially less bulky than she used to look. I guess she traded crossfit and powerlifting for ketogenic diet, fasting, and whatever the trend to be lean is…and I think it’s a good thing, even though I found her powerlifting legs kind hot and sturdy….

I guess she’s ramping up for the Lizzie Maguire redo that no one asked for but that everyone and their mother knows is going to be a huge fucking show thanks to the general public being nostalgic idiots that like familiar things because it feels like home and because they want to fit in with the cool kids on social media with no opinion of their own…they just know they have to watch some shit, even in the background, to say they watched it…you know to fit in…like Hilary Duff is fitting into these shorts…

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Posted in:90s Dance Party|Hilary Duff|SFW

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