Eva Longoria has been the most overrated pile of shit celebrity in modern times according to me….which isn’t saying much because my opinion means nothing.

I remember drinking about 5 years ago maybe it was 10 years ago…who knows it was a long time ago and my brain is one big horrible blur….but that night, I met a handful of Europeans who were so hyped on Eva Longoria and it was long enough after Housewives for me to say “what the fuck are ya’ll talking about”….because who the fuck conversations about celebrities in their free time at a bar when there are strippers around to pay to touch their tits…

Anyway, it was then that I realized her marketing team have a broad reach, and that they really thought she was the biggest deal out there….and not one of them saw her as the self hating Mexican who you know only hires Mexican gardeners for her mansions, in order to really be as white as she can be, something I am sure stems back to her High School days in Mexico when she was ashamed of her parents who were first generation, you know immigrant self-hatred, it happens.

Now I can’t confirm that she has house staff that are Mexicans she only speaks english to, but I’d love to hear from some of her past workers to see how nice she was to them, cuz I look at her and see cunt…and not cuz she’s showing cunt, even though she could be, but because she’s not showing cunt, which would make me understand her international stardom….or at least not care that she has international stardom for no reason…because I’d be looking at her cunt…

She’s old, probably photoshopped, in a bikini, and this is exciting to people, even if it looks like she’s got a baby bump…..we know she’s too old for one of those again…

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Posted in:Eva Longoria