Eva Longoria is old as shit, so it’s safe to assume that her ass is a product of a cosmetic procedure she can easily afford because she’s rich as shit..

I don’t like Eva Longoria, she seems like a self hating Mexican who exploits the culture when it is convenient for her personal gain, but she is internationally famous for whatever reason and because of that she’s retarded rich, despite being totally unimpressive.

There was a time when she was in her 30s and was into fitness where she’d walk around with her ass out and you’d think, fine…she’s worth looking at…

She’s about 40 pounds heavier and her ass is rounder than it was back then, which makes me think that granny is on the rich lady program of jacking up her body.

I want to make it clear that I am not hyping her ass up, it looks like it’s fake, from a cartoon, not a good thing…I’ve seen strippers with this kind of thing, fat chicks who get their belly fat sucked out to make this kind of thing…it’s always pretty disturbing.

But people are conditioned to like this kind of thing, so it strategically makes sense for chunky Eva Longoria to Ozempic, fake ass her way into a few bonus jerks from a loyal fanbase who has been jerking to her forever…

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Eva Longoria is pretty old, but being of some other ethnic decent, her rot is a little less dramatic than if she was raised in a Texas trailer park eating cheese puffs and Mountain Dew…

I’ve always found her to be a race baiter, which as far as I know, which isn’t much, that means she exploits her MEXICANISM to get work, to investors, rich as shit in the process and marketed as being hot as shit and the international market just bought into it…

She seems like the kind of Mexican who doesn’t speak Spanish and who hires Mexicans to be her slaves around her properties to feel like she’s made it…

But who cares about any of that when you can stare at her old fat mom ass with the right amount of cottage cheese to make it feel more real than the asses of instagram…

I still don’t like her, but I do like THONG bikinis…even when they’re not age appropriate…because old ladies keep on holdin’ on….what a whore…

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Eva Longoria is very famous on the international level but I don’t like Eva Longoria because she’s a race baiter…which to me is like a rape victim realizing that they get sympathy from their rape story because they are victims, so they make it their identity and recruit a bunch of other bitches into signing onto being creeped on by dudes and next thing you have the #MeToo movement ruining the lives of every dude who has ever flirted with a bitch, while the bitches who accuse them give each other massages in some kind of group therapy session of support, hoping they can go on with their lives…

You know what I mean, they see an angle and they take it….so Longoria who is a Mexican that looked like she was a Mexican who doesn’t speak Spanish or go to Mexico, but who hires Mexicans as her slaves, to assert herself as a non-Mexican Mexican, until realizing that being a Mexican was an advantage in this diversity and equity movement, so she milked that shit harder than she milked her tits for every job she ever got back when she was pretending to be as non-Mexican as possibe…..she even has a show about Mexican food…

Anyway, in being Mexican, it looks like she got a BBL, possibly for this sheer thong dress she’s too old to be wearing, because that ass looks unnaturally round and Mexicans aren’t typically known for their booties, that’s a different kind of Spanish speaker…

She’s put out this photoshoot of her big round ass, which could be a BBL, rocking a sheer dress she’s too old for, and it’s pretty fucking weird, but it’s booty content and we like BOOTY…which is why we urge Longoria to join CHEEKED UP !

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Eva Longoria posted a set of pictures to her instagram where she’s wearing what looks like some metallic dress. If you zoom in on the tit, which I did, because what the fuck else are you supposed to do with instagram pics, you can see what looks like a hard nip.

The Mexican who I feel grew up pretending to be as far removed from being Mexican as possible, only to decide to embrace being Mexican when realizing how fucking awesome being Mexican is, especially when the powers of the Hollywood industry that control you because they gave you a lifeline decide that they need a Mexican voice to execute their money making scheme….

Well, Longoria has WAY too much hype and money for what you’d want from a first generation border jumper. People on the international level love her, like they love Taylor Swift and it’s hard to wrap your head around since neither are that great…but in the gold dress, with what could be the outline of a nipple, it’s fine….she’s old, but it’s fine…

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Since I love Mexico and Mexican women, except maybe my prostitute mom who died of AIDS in the 80s, but I’m not one of those damaged victim losers who hold grudges and who blames their miserable life, their unhappiness, their terrible choices on other people, like parents, exes or trauma….I hold no real grudges because I am too fucking lazy and the fact that a prostitute mom did not kill me off is actually a win, a huge positive thing for society as a whole because I get to update this site in what will be 20 fucking years this November…I started it in 2004. Shocking. Miserable but also pretty hilarious, the longest running troll I’ve ever committed to and it’s allowed me to meet all of you.

Anyway, since I love Mexican women, I feel compelled to post content from the famous Mexican women, like Eva Longoria who is arguably the most OVERRATED Mexican woman, one I assume barely even speaks Mexican because as a first generation she shunned her amazing Mexican culture to be the whitest of white gringo fucks at the mall plotting her takeover of Hollywood that would DEFINITELY include exploiting being a marginalized Mexican women, even though she likely employs marginalized Mexican maids for her LA house just to assert her dominance like humping dog at the dog park.

I guess what I am saying is that my love for Mexican women runs deep, but some don’t quite make the cut when they’ve shunned Mexico unless it’s beneficial for their bullshit. Eva Longoria is the worst.

She’s in a bathing suit though, so tits in a bathing suit, not quite the taco we’d want to eat, but it’s something for the brainwashed Longoria fans.

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I saw some story about how Eva Longoria was hosting a movie night at the White House, which is almost as weird of a thing to do at the White House as inviting topless trannies to dance around with the commander in chief, but these are weird modern times, and that’s just how thing work out.

I was wondering if the screening was a paid ad by the movie company, you know part their marketing initiatives, because the movie “Flamin’ Hot” about the guy who created the Flaming Hot Cheetos flavor, who it was probably stolen from as he was a low level worker, but I don’t actually care to find out what the real story is because it’s fucking Cheetos man….who fucking cares…

So the White House isn’t screening any historical movie, any WAR movie, and America is amazing, look at what we’ve done movie…but rather Eva Longoria directed Cheetos smut…it’s fucking odd…..

Then I realized, “how did Longoria get famous anyway”, I know the official story is that she was born in Texas, first generation but couldn’t that be faked, and couldn’t she actually be one of the human trafficked kids who they just allowed into Hollywood based on good dick sucking behavior? I mean the elites can’t KILL every kid they traffic, can they? Some must end up somewhere, doing some work as the mind controlled slaves they’ve been abused into being….but that’s probably all just CONSPIRACY.

Well, there’s a clip circulating of Longoria and the President from the event, which could definitely be AI from the ALT RIGHT to push some agendas they push, or it could in fact be real, where they CLEARLY seem to know each other well.

You gotta give it to the President, if Longoria is that close to you and you don’t cop a feel or do an accidental RUB down, you’re kinda missing the point…and it’s that GRAB THEM BY THE BALLS attitude that allows you to lead the FREE world into the greatness he’s led you into.

I’m Canadian, so our dude’s rubbing down Drag Queens not top stars dudes jerk off to, so America remains more masculine to us cucks….

She seems to have liked the presidential rub down, some JFk / Marilyn Monroe shit right here? Right?!

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This is from September 5th, so I may have already posted it, you know, all these clickbating celebs trying to compete with the influencers in the most desperate ways is hilarious, since there was a time when celebrities were kept at an arm’s length from you, their personal lives secret, the allure of celebrity compelling because it was a limited club, and we only got what they fed us!

Now these aged out bitches who shouldn’t even know what the internet or social media is based on their age alone, but also based on their celebrity alone, are posting thirst trap pics in their mid 40s to get jerked off to, or to show off that they do fitness!

They are rich, they are working, this Mexican has a Tequila brand, yet here she is with a “look at me, you’d like to fuck me, but you never will since I’m famous”..

So they all have the same shitty “I am a celebrity, thus better than you” ego, but they also post low hanging fruit safe for work smut like they’re an 18 year old about to launch an Onlyfans because working is for suckers!

It’s a weird dynamic, but I’ve hated Eva Longoria pretty much since she became famous as a race baiter, who is Mexican, but who seems like she uses that to get ahead and that’s just trash!

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