This is some old pussy news, literally old pussy news, because it’s Chelsea Handler is out here celebrating her 47th birthday, which means her already well travelled pussy, that’s been down the trying to get famous until finally becoming famous thanks to her talk show that I never watched but that people loved, even though I remember seeing clips of her from the show being more mean spirited than funny, which I guess I can related to because sometimes mean spirited is funny…

Anyway, comedy is a good way to get famous, when all else fails do comedy….climbing the comedy ladder on the dicks of lame ass comedians who people seem to think are cool or who have clout in the industry is far less challenging than fucking the right TV producer or Director when getting your start.

Anyway, point of the story is I am sure she’s fucked a lot regardless and now in her retirement she hangs out in Canada, where weed is legal, where she gets her skiing on, and like all instagram whores on the ski hill, she stripped down to do a bikini ski to celebrate not having died of AIDS or some other HPV related cancers as you’d expect from her well travelled pussy.

She’s got fake tits that I doubt are 47 year olds, so if you focus on those instead of the rest of her, it’s like you aren’t sexualizing menopause but rather youthful perky tits in some old skin that doesn’t look so old thanks to being stretched the fuck out.

All this to say, I appreciate the effort.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Chelsea Handler