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Archive for the Chelsea Handler Category

2024

10

Jun

Chelsea Handler Promotes her Hawaii Tour with her Ass of the Day

Chelsea Handler may be a vile piece of shit, but she’s also promoting herself by using the body part where she actually produces her vile pieces of shit…just a different kind of vile pieces of shit, but from the same vile pieces of shit…which brings up a very important philosophical question and that is if a vile piece of shit takes a shit, is it’s a more pure and disgusting form of shit than if some pure and wonderful thing produced a shit, not that pure and wonderful women shit, that asshole’s just a second vagina for when they are on their period or something to lick on or stick your finger in when you’re looking for something to do with your hands…

Point of the story, Chelsea Handler is using her ass to promote things and she’s definitely A LOT too old for sexualizing herself, yet here she is doing it for clicks, because these people are all fucking mental….

But you’re also mental, and probaly want to handle her with your hands…wear her like a glove baby, wrist deep.

Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2024

26

Feb

Chelsea Handler Geriatric Bikini Skiing for Attention of the Day

Chelsea Handler may be old as shit, but that doesn’t stop her from producing some shitty clickbait with her literal joker face, that should get her banned from the hill and that would probably get anyone who isn’t a celebrity banned from the hill, but since she’s famous, the hill is just stoked she there producing content for them.

I have heard that she has a place at Whistler, so this may be in Canada where her weed smoking and cocktail drinking while carrying her dogs down the hill is seen as normal, but that face, that plastic face that looks like it was scared into paralysis, or maybe like it was cast and put onto a Disney animatronic, you know looking like she’s skiing a MACH speed so that her flappy ass skin pulls back so hard it makes this face make sense, but when you look at her gut and her weak skiing ability, you know that no MACH SPEED is being had….that face isn’t stuck to the top of the chairlift stretching with each turn as her body moves further and futher away from it….but instead, it’s just the product of over-mangling.

All this to say the dogs are cute, this should be seen as abuse, SHUT HER DOWN..

Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2023

26

Sep

Chelsea Handler Expired Uterus of the Day

I think Chelsea Handler is trying to shake her dried up uterus out of her, you know like dog with a rotted out tooth, just trying to gnaw the motherfucker out of his goddamn mouth because it’s causing pain, infection and his natural instinct is to remove it, or like a prostitute who just got a few condoms lost inside her, only realizing it months later when trying to track down the rancid smell, just jumping up and down in some kind of spastic panic hoping they fall out of her….

Only instead of condoms, it’s a uterus which probably served the same purpose as a condom all those years of her climbing the ranks of comedy legend status…meaning Chelsea’s barren spinster womb is basically a female condom she was born with and it’s starting to stink..

Point of the story, the shameless funny girl is half naked and disgustingly old.

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Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2023

07

Aug

Chelsea Handler Swimsuit of the Day

Chelsea Handler in her swimsuit, although an age appropriate swimsuit, since she’s old as shit and should keep that gunt, or APRON BELLY that normally comes with childbirth, something she skipped out on because she’s a self involved, career oriented cunt, stunted but will realize she made a huge mistake eventually…if she hasn’t already….since the whole purpose of being a woman is making babies…not doing it is some freakish shit that miserable women will try to defend, but we all know in their core they don’t mean it and the older they get and the dumpier they get in their body, realizing that they weren’t able to preserve their bodies, or their blown out pussies because instead of babies, they were taking cock to fill the void, which I guess had the same results on their limited elasticity thanks to aging…

What I am saying is that Chelsea Handler gamed the system into thinking she’s funny, by fucking the right comedic people, it’s an easy scene for a woman to break into and just talk fake sex stories about awkward thoughts while being eaten out for other women, relatable jokes you see…..

So in being old as shit, she’d be better if she had a kid, because it would at least justify her haggard body…if you know what I mean….

The kid is a good excuse, what’s you’re excuse NEVER GRANNY…but still lookin GRANNY…

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Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2023

28

Jul

Chelsea Handler Swimsuit of the Day

Chelsea Handler is a pretty desperate for attention comic, who probably only became a comic because she was a pretty desperate for attention actress, that no one was giving the good jobs to, so in an act of sadness, she went to the LA comedy clubs with her tits that she was willing to show off in the shitty early acting jobs she had, knowing the comedian bros wouldn’t be able to refuse her or not give her what she wants, because comedians, even rich ones are some of the biggest losers around…

You see, I’ve said it before, and I realize that I am a comedy snob or comedy hater, but the whole stand up thing is a scripted act, a whole practice a joke over and over in front of the mirror like a loser who is trying to be funny, rather than being organically funny, so they make their life and career around being the funny guy, only to tell the same jokes like a dude with dementia at the old folks home…

If they are lucky, they have a hook, like being a midget or a fat person or a tranny, so that they can make fun of their marginalized group for the normies to feel ok about laughing at the marginalized group without being cancelled…MAKE ANOTHER MIDGET JOKE MIDGET…..or MAKE ANOTHER FAT JOKE LOUIE ANDERSON….oh wait, he’s dead…but you know what I mean…

The people at the comedy show are there to laugh, so you have a captive audience ready to laugh when told to laugh, so it’s not anything like busting a joke to some miserable cop arrested you and getting a laugh out of him, or making a girl who hates you for hitting on her laugh with your charm…it’s less skillful than that…so overall, comics are fags, female comics are whores, and Handler with all her money all out of touch is in a one piece bathing suit, because she’s old but still trying to be relevant thanks to desperation…

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Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2023

22

Jun

Chelsea Handler Ass of the Day

I don’t really understand Chelsea Handler’s cunty sense of humor, but I know that I’ve never found her funny. Maybe it’s because I’m not a catty and empty flacid white woman who connects to her relatable shit, but ultimately, I always thought she sucked and was happy to see her show cancel, even though they gave her a travel show to compensate for being dropped, which wasn’t renewed because clearly other people felt she sucked….and not just dudes who she literally sucked to get the career she had as a funny girl when the whole acting thing didn’t work out for her….

The problem is that CLEARLY Handler doesn’t think she sucks, she thinks she’s hilarious, an innovator, rich because of how important she is, and WORST of all, she thinks she’s hot…

Sure, she’s got fat tits, plastic surgery, blonde hair and in the 90s was probably a cute girl leaving her home down for that DREAMS of Hollywood, and sure she was hot enough to be the COMEDY STORE WHORE which opened doors thanks to powerful people hanging there and happy to get their dick sucked there…but she’s in her 50s, looks like shit and yet she keeps on producing salacious lewd content….

Whether it’s her tits out, her bikini, her ass, she’s fucking nasty, menopausal, boxy and if this is just some aging white woman comedy, which it probably is, I know I don’t fucking like it one bit….but it’s pretty fucking obvious that HANDLER thinks it’s amazing….so I post it to shame her by having you losers jerk off to her…

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Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2023

10

May

Chelsea Handler Topless Promoting Sterilization of the Day


Chelsea Handler is making some kind of fake news content around her tits, by calling them real even though I am pretty sure they’re fake tits, but if you say they aren’t then they aren’t. Who are you to question a woman, MISOGYNIST.

In this video where she’s holding her tits, she’s pushing some weird propaganda about encouraging men to get their balls clipped in a Vasectomy for birth control, which I guess is a better approach than pushing ABORTION, but still some weird feminist agenda that’s so distant from REAL LIFE, but that in their closed off world of celebrity, seems to be an ISSUE of the times…..that they need to get behind and promote…like the trans agenda…or really anything that involves sterilizing people.

She’s got the most aggressive filters and GLAM on yet she looks fucking hideous, so luckily for us she’s got her tits in her hands to distract us from whatever the fuck this bullshit is.

Not only does it push really weak jokes about how dudes don’t like using condoms with her nasty box, or that IUDs feel like MOUSE TRAPS on her HPV cervix….its’ ALSO scripted and ACTED OUT by someone who claims to be a professional….a pro….a high paid talent…yet it feels like it’s from a group of elderly women at the home working on a video workshop as one of their organized old person activities.

I still think her tits are fake and saying that there’s nothing wrong with fake tits, even though there is….because they cause inflammation, they perpetuate lies that fake tits are equal to natural big tits, and more importantly….they just fuel the insecurity these people who think men hate women yet try to appease men with their face filters Clearly have.

In conclusion, Handler is TRASH, her hand bra trash, her face trash and her performance in this video trash, her comedy trash, and if people are into this kind of thing, BLOCK and DELETE, they don’t matter in the world we want for ourselves…

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Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2023

06

Apr

Chelsea Handler Underboob of the Day

Funny girl, who I am sure really isn’t that funny, since comedians are generally not funny, but with the help of some witchcraft convince people that they are funny, and with the general population being morons who buy into everything they are told, it works out nicely for the non-funny people who pretend to be funny and who society decides are funny..Chelsea Handler, is showing off her boxy, menopausal, old, glory days behind her, under tit at the ski-hill bathroom, since she’s a skier now.

I am all for any sluts at the Ski hill pulling their big, fake looking tits out, even if it’s just the bottom quarter of the tit, since it’s tit.

Even if it’s attached to a miserable cunt, an unfunny cunt, a boring try to hard to be funny that it misses the mark cunt.

Even if it’s sad, lonely and pathetic behavior that just shows us her true colors of attention seeking, willing to do anything to fill that void in her soul that got her famous in the first place, because I don’t get too involved in how shit these people are, I just stick to their shameless self promotion that they may pretend is shocking or interesting or edgy, trying to be current like the old lady at the party who is so cool and doesn’t give a fuck but ultimately cares way too much and hates being the old bitch at the part….

The joke, which isn’t a very good joke is bad skiing too fast her tits busted through her top joke that you can easily ignore and just stare at the tits, so it works…

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Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2023

27

Feb

Chelsea Handler Skiing in a Bikini of the Day

This is some old pussy news, literally old pussy news, because it’s Chelsea Handler is out here celebrating her 47th birthday, which means her already well travelled pussy, that’s been down the trying to get famous until finally becoming famous thanks to her talk show that I never watched but that people loved, even though I remember seeing clips of her from the show being more mean spirited than funny, which I guess I can related to because sometimes mean spirited is funny…

Anyway, comedy is a good way to get famous, when all else fails do comedy….climbing the comedy ladder on the dicks of lame ass comedians who people seem to think are cool or who have clout in the industry is far less challenging than fucking the right TV producer or Director when getting your start.

Anyway, point of the story is I am sure she’s fucked a lot regardless and now in her retirement she hangs out in Canada, where weed is legal, where she gets her skiing on, and like all instagram whores on the ski hill, she stripped down to do a bikini ski to celebrate not having died of AIDS or some other HPV related cancers as you’d expect from her well travelled pussy.

She’s got fake tits that I doubt are 47 year olds, so if you focus on those instead of the rest of her, it’s like you aren’t sexualizing menopause but rather youthful perky tits in some old skin that doesn’t look so old thanks to being stretched the fuck out.

All this to say, I appreciate the effort.

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Posted in:Chelsea Handler

2021

25

Jun

Chelsea Handler is Gay of the Day

I got in a minor Facebook, despite hating social media, argument with some gays because they were mad someone posted that the NFL dude coming out being treated as a hero was pretty obnoxious, since who the fuck cares who fucks whatever they chose to fuck, this gay thing is out of hand, if everyone is gay, what’s the big fucking deal….

I typically avoid Facebook and all social media because they are the fucking devil on all levels and have never done anything good for me, especially now in the era of uptight fucks sitting their waiting to be mad…

I remember right before Twitter deleted my “new” account during the Oscars or some shit, I called out some tired comedian’s skit and some lady made it a race thing, and I wasn’t even thinking of the comedian’s race, realizing, we’ve lost the battle…everyone was easily triggered which is hilarious on a level, but not when they side with the triggered….

Anyway, all these gays got mad at me for agreeing that the gay thing shouldn’t be a talking point, it’s not the 90s when the real gay revolution happened, it’s more a fetish now, something different to do, as everyone is becoming Brave New World fuck each other at all times cuz cumming is good…

So seeing Handler and the top of her fake tits with her pride flag is like seeing corporations with the pride flag…or the white house with the pride flag…it’s pandering…and if she really wanted to trigger the gays, she should uncross those legs and show us her balls.

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Posted in:Chelsea Handler