This is a horrible way to wake up, the only salvation we have is that Russell Brand’s heroin addiction was actual fact and not just a bullshit book he wrote as an “autobiography” from his parent’s basement that lead to his MTV career and that lead to his Hollywood career, and that he shared needles, is too scared to get tested for AIDS and has infected this Katy Perry dog so they both live sick and miserable lives with no energy to perform ever again.

The only thing that makes sense in all this is that I thought brand was a full poofter and that his sex jokes were all just the same bullshit that landed him his career, when really he wanted to rim Seth Rogan with his cock head or some shit, so that would explain why he’s so smitten with Katy Perry, because he doesn’t realize she is the ugly pig that she is, he just knows pretending to kiss her is good for his career…..and the whole thing is pretty fucking sick.

Pics via INFphoto

Posted in:Katy Perry|Love|Russell Brand