I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2010

10

Sep

Lacey Schwimmer is the Fattest Professional Dancer of the Day

Fuck DWTS, this bitch needs to get on video in spandex on Youtube…cuz fat girls aren’t supposed to dance…and when they do it’s fucking funny to watch….

These legs are trunks…Shit is not fucking normal for someone who burns 3000 calories a day….why she looks like this really just doesn’t make any fucking sense to me…

I know she’s fucking ugly..anyone with eyes can see she’s a beast of a girl…and I am not trying to give her credit she doesn’t deserve. She’s already tricked her way onto TV and avoided a shitty stripping career as the stripper no one gets dances from except for people who feel sorry for her or people who she gives a discount to, or people who like the bottom feeder ugliest bitch in the room trash cuz it is their fetish…. I just really think she’d be better off falling off a table while dancing on Youtube, or having a stripper pole catastrophe, fuck being on mainstream television, this tank is a Internet legend in the making….

Get her to partner up with the world’s shortest man, and I think my brain would explode trying to process the amazingness…

Here is some Dirty Dancing Pussy 3 decades too late, because I watch Dirty Dancing weekly, shit is better than porn to me, even though I never quite got what Patrick Swayze saw in her, other than the fact that she was Jewish and everyone knows that thanks to Summer camp, Jewish girls give AMAZING head….and also quite good at wearing ill-fitting sweat pants….

Posted in:Lacey Schwimmer

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