I’m guessing Uma Thurman is doing the “I can’t get that much work, but China is willing to pay me 100,000,000 dollars to be in a shitty commercial” hustle….Not that this is an ad from China, but it is an ad, and you know when a celebrity starts doing ads, they’re out for the money.

That said, I don’t know what the fuck Schweppes was thinking lining this bitch up with a part that implies sex on any level, everytime she mentions where she wants to have “schweppes” I crings as I look at her man hands that would make my dick look like more of a clit while in the handjob positions….

And I think to myself, why the fuck didn’t they hire someone for the same amount of money, who the general public actually wants to think about having sex, and not just someone Quentin Tarantino used to make use a strap-on for him in exchange for endless roles in his movie…

You see, this is a major disconnect from what the people want and what the gay marketers think we want.

But watch it anyway, you may like it, you know, with the whole closet case shit you’re going through….

Posted in:Uma Thurman