I have no fucking clue as to whether these are old or new, but I have decided to post them anyway because dolphins are our friend and Tara Reid isn’t, even though she’d probably suck our dicks for a couple bucks at this point in our career, I suggest holding out a few more years, cuz then she’ll let you stuff her like a Christmas Turkey, that is if you are not poor, because this Christmas our family had a can of beans, which I guess you could technically take the lid off and fuck and it would probably make less of a mess than shoving it inside this whore….

Speaking of whores, I went to the strip club tonight and I drank with my friend who owns a video camera and wants to shoot some stepTV stuff. I tried to convince him to get a lap dance from my favorite little mangled tooth dancer, but he fagged out on me. The best I could do is get her to sit on his lap and pull out her tits and she didn’t charge me…I guess she knows I am famous or poor, I am going to stick with the latter. I always hated people who say former and latter, it drives me nuts cuz it confuses me and I just dropped it like I know what I’m fucking doing…it’s a Christmas Miracle….

I had another Christmas Miracle today and it’s January….I put on the videographers night driving glasses and the dull world I’ve been living it became vibrant, the buildings had edges and the signs on the street had letters. I always had a feeling my eyes were fucked because living in a blurry world isn’t normal, but could never afford glasses..so I stole these ones. I had them for 5 minutes before my wife tried them on and snapped off an arm with her fat face….

Speaking for fat faces, here’s them there Tara Reid pics… I am hunting for funny in all the wrong places.. fucker.

I crossed anabandoned street blindly, that means without looking both ways and I survived. I figure that’s his way of telling me it’s not my time to go. He then guided me to the Chinese restaurant where I ate some General TAO chicken that tasted like socks, I was only charged 4 dollars, I guess they knew I had Jesus by my side. I then let Jesus guide me to the strip club where a stripper to pulled out a tit and asked me to touch it, when I was done she charged me the regular 10 dollars but I could tell by the sparkle in her eye that she knew there was more to this Christmas Miracle then I was letting up….A

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