The Jewish girls I come across look more like a muppet than anything I’d want to fuck. You know with their big noses and droopy eyes, something so wonky lookin’ that you’d expect it them to have a hand jacked up their asses making them whine about everything they can think of on their way to get get their nails and hair done in daddy’s Lexus SUV because daddy doesn’t buy German cars after what the German’s did to his people or some shit. I just always blamed the facial disorder on the incest the strength of the culture is based on. It was also the reason I had for their asthma, allergies, bad eyesight and money making ability. So when I see Mila Kunis knowing she’s Jew I get thrown off in a good way. Maybe I shouldn’t be so quick to judge their people because there’s always going to be an exception to the rule and maybe I should be more accepting as a person but the truth is I am pretty accepting and just cuz a bitch looks like a muppet never stopped me from letting them show off their blow job skills they learnt in camp on me. I actually encourage rich girls whose parents want them to marry into their religion to use me as a form of rebellion against the family but that’s just because when a bitch thinks she’s being naughty, it usually comes through in the way she fucks, so Muppet-faced or not, I am usually always down for a good time.

Unfortunately, Mila Kunis has some sick Home Alone 1 through 3 fantasy that’s lead her to end up with Macaulay Culkin. She’s been with him for 8 years or some shit and seems like she is under his child star spell, so that just leaves me with jerking off to her voice on Family Guy or reruns of That 70s Show, now all I need to make that happen is a TV. I guess it’s good to have dreams.

In case you didn’t know, Complex featured me in their magazine too. I guess that may make their editorial team questionable, but I think it makes them my friend so click the link and show them some love, because they showed me love and that’s gotta count for something.

Posted in:Complex|Jew|Mila Kunis