Phoebe Price is still trying to ride the wave of finally making it onto the cover of some tabloid for having the most disgusting cellulite ridden legs, only this time she’s hired a photographer who does some touch-ups, I guess she’s finally realized the less clothes she wears the more people care about her and by people I mean me, because I encourage girls coming to terms with this obvious concept, even if they’re doing it about 25 years too late.

I remember when I was hanging out at an old folks home for kicks and I started talking to this crazy senile bitch who had a pretty stacked body for an old lady and she knew it because all the dudes in the home all tried to get up in her. She loved the attention and would play it up and when I suggested a Geriatric Wet T-Shirt contest she was the first one in line. Unfortunately, she drowned. I am just kidding, we got stopped before the fun went down and I was asked to never step food in the home again because my kind of volunteering is not one they appreciate, but I’ll never forget that little heartbreaker who was a literal heartbreaker because she killed at least more than one dude in her seductive, big breasted, cock teasing antics.

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