I don’t like that Ashley Tisdale is giving us the sex eyes because she isn’t hot, it is actually pretty fucking offensive. If she really wanted to turn us on, she would have never left the house, or maybe she would have pulled her hair in front of her face like she was Cousin It, or she’d rock a Richard Nixon mask while running around screaming that she’s not a crook naked, or something that could at least let us focus on her vagina for a couple of minuts and forget what it’s attached to.

It’s like the typical ugly chick who doesn’t know she’s ugly because she hangs with girls who are uglier than her and her entourage always tell her how good looking sh eis and ends up living in an imaginary fantasy world, where all the boys want her and not her friends and she develops the self confidence to not kill herself or just embrace the fact that she’s ugly and becoming a comedian, because that’s what ugly people in Hollywood are supposed to do. Playing this sex symbol to 13 year olds is just going to fuck up the system, making boys think this is hot, leading to ugly girls getting boyfriends when they are supposed to stay at home friday nights knitting with their moms a few years down the road or even worse….homosexuality.

On a side note, happy Yom Kippur to Ashley Tisdale and all the Jews out there. The man on the radio just let me know that you all have to fast. Good luck with that and remember it’s a small price to pay for legal, medical and entertainment careers that pay lots of money, so it’s worth the struggle, despite the whining I am sure all your Jew houses are going to hear tonight, you know whimpers about how hungry you are and how light headed you are and how you think you’re going to die if you don’t get a fucking bagel in you, so for that struggle, I’d like to dedicate this post to all of yous jews.

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Ugly