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Archive for the Ugly Category

2010

14

May

Rumer Willis Needs Plastic Surgery of the Day

When is Rumer Willis going to take her mother’s lead and get her fucking face fixed, cuz seriously, she harldly looks human….she is all lopsided and shit making me wonder what thef fuck Demi Moore did to her when she was in the womb…I’m thinking coat hanger.

Posted in:Rumer Willis|Ugly

2010

30

Apr

Ugly Gwenyth Paltrow Thanks Nepotism for her Career of the Day

I never found Gwenyth Paltrow hot. So when she married her Coldplay singer and went into hiding in order to live her hippie bullshit fake-intellectual artist life. I was happy….

But apparently Gwenyth Paltrow has crawled out of her cave and started to make appearances because she’s in Iron Man 2…..like any hippie bullshit fake-intellectual artist would…

Today she was on The View wearing this outfit where she was talking about how she trained 6 days a week for 1.5 hours a day and watched what she ate in preperation for this outfit and the funny thing is that I don’t think it would make a difference, cuz fat or not bitch is only getting work and only has a career cuz of her connected family members, so she’s should stop bothering trying and accept the fact that skinny or not she’s still ugly….a last name goes a long way…and apparently so does this Iron Man franchise cuz everyone is freaking out about the shit and really who gives a fuck or get excited about this shit…or about her…cuz she’s old, washed-up and ugly and in shorts…good times.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Gwenyth Paltrow|Ugly

2010

01

Apr

Ashlee Simpson Shows Off her Legs to Distract from her Face of the Day

I have never been turned on by Ashlee Simpson. The only good thing about her was that that she was the ugly sister and ugly sisters try harder to make you cum than the hotter sister or even the average girl because they’ve got a complex and spent their lives feeling second rate and second rate always picks up the slack for being the ugly sister by servicing men better if they aren’t the kind of second rate that kills themselves cuz they can’t deal with being second rate…..I figured the only guys she’d get would be no names trying to get close to Jessica Simpson, but she proved me wrong by marrying and getting knocked up by some homosexual possibly because Jessica Simpson turned fat and battered looking, making the calls to Ashlee Simpson totally die down…or maybe she just wanted a guy she could share her clothes with…and I guess none of that matters and what does matter is that she knows to show off her thin legs, to distract us from her face and to find female escort that is even uglier than her to make her look less ugly….and that effort shouldn’t go unnoticed….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|Legs|Ugly

2010

22

Mar

Olivia Munn Does Complex of the Day

I don’t like anything about Olivia Munn. There are hotter girls sitting on my stoop in the summer than this bitch, but the girls on my stoop just aren’t as good at marketing themselves to an audience of people who are easy to win over. Seriously, being the poster girl of G4 TV to technology-obsessed geeks really doesn’t take much….as they are loyal and just like any girl who speaks their language….and as she slowly sneaks her way into the masturbation of dudes who aren’t gamer virgins, like the hip hop crowd, I’ll be there to watch and wonder why…cuz sometimes life’s mysteries, like Olivia Munn being seen as hot, makes life more interesting than if there was an actual hot girl on the cover of this mag.

I do love Complex because they did a feature on me a long time ago….but Olivia Munn needs replacing despite how loyal these gamer virgins are…seriously…one gamer loser I know still talks about Sarah Michelle Gellar in Buffy like shit hasn’t been off the air for a decade….

Posted in:Complex|Olivia Munn|Ugly

2010

19

Mar

Ashley Tisdale Ugly Watch of the Day

I do a little thing here called the Ashley Tisdale Ugly Watch and it was inspired from when I saw her on TV getting an award for being a starlet of the year for some MTV shit because I got mad. It was like a bitch who was destined to be the annoying girl in your math class, somehow got confused along the way and instead of working towards her law degree or her MBA, she got mixed up in Hollywood, despite having a face for Accountring….so I figured I had no choice but to remind the public, and by public I mean on reader I have, that this bitch may be worth a fuck at the office Christmas party after a few too many drinks, but she’s not worth jerking off, even if she plays a 14 year old in the movies….and if you look close enough you’ll notice she has the same hips as your younger brother, something most people don’t find hot, unless you’re a little league coach or priest.

So here she is with her asymmetrical face and the funniest thing in all this is that she’s already tried to alter her shit with plastic surgery and this is what she ended up with…it’s like seeing a dude get his shitbox car painted for 5000 dollars and shit comes back looking just as bad as it did before…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|Ugly

2010

18

Mar

Whitney Port is an Ugly Shopper of the Day

Whitney Port is not hot, but she is on TV so I guess that by default makes her better looking than the average person, even though she’s not. It’s like TV makes dudes think they are supposed to like a bitch, even if she’s really nothing special…and if they don’t they are fucking queer..but based on my logic…if you watch The Hills or know the cast of The Hills that already means you’re a queer and maybe that makes me a queer too…who uses this site to lure you closet cases into sending me cock shots…or maybe it’s got more to do with me giving up my own life to sit her posting pictures of people I consider far more useless than me and I’m not sure if you realizie this…but that’s PRETTY fucking usless….so here are some pictures to make us all feel good about ourselves and maybe inspire some of you to send pics of your dicks to dudes and collectively give us all hope that soon enough these idiots will disappear and their shit show will be cancelled, leaving them with nothing else to do….Yay. I love failure even if it happens after they’ve made stupid fucking money..

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Ugly|Whitney Port

2010

11

Mar

The New Gaga and Beyonce Telephone Video of the Day

I hate Gaga and Beyonce more than you know or understand…like I really can’t stand her but figured some of you may want to see her stripped down by dyke cops in a prison fantasy video that makes a comment about her “dick”….complete with make-out scenes, taped up nipples and a whole women’s in their panties in some prison fantasy you will probably like….but I stopped watching because I can’t take this twat seriously…this is really like some kind of bad joke…enjoy…drinking time.

Posted in:Beyonce|Cunts|Lady Gaga|Panties|Prison|Ugly

2010

02

Mar

Human Trafficked Girl of the Day

This bitch should have been thankful that they recruited her to be human trafficked, because at least she got some male attention and sex, when she otherwise wouldn’t.

I don’t really buy this bullshit story about being raped and extorted by telling her they would show her parents, I think she got a taste for cock and liked it, because this bitch isn’t from some Eastern European trying to escape the country for citizenship in America , or some Asian kid who was kidnapped for ladyboy sex in Thailand, she some eager suburban girl who got looped into some bullshit that they are calling Human Trafficking when really it’s just fucking old school prostitution….and prostitution, no matter what you call it…is porn to me…

Posted in:Sex Trafficker|Ugly

2010

02

Mar

Kristen Stewart is Horrible Looking of the Day

I think I should be putting Kristen Stewart on the death watch because she looks like she’s on some kind of drugs and is about to fucking die. I know this grimey disgusting stinky pussy look is her thing, but I have seen gutter street kids yelling at the brick wall while trying to clean out their crack pipe, look better and healthier than this….

I knew she was not all that good looking to begin with and that she was cast in Twilight so that all the ugly girls of America wouldn’t feel alienated by her looks and could relate and fantasize to the love story that made them all have their first teen orgasm ever, making Twilight actually pornographic material designed for teenage girls…. while taking an already ugly thing and give up on it turning it into some kind of greasy wreck of a thing you’d expect to find in a gutter, unhealthy and skinny and week makes Kristen Stewart actually pornographic material for me…but that’s just because I like my masturbation to involve girls who are ugly enough to be attainable and weak enough to be unable to run when I’ve got them cornered…I’m a romantic like that.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Kristen Stewart|Ugly|Wreck

2010

26

Feb

AnnaLynne McCord’s Busted Face of the Day

AnnaLynne McCord is perfect to start my hungover Friday with, because before being a married miserable old fuck, I used to get pussy, and often times that pussy was girls I was too drunk to really realize just how ugly they were, and often times I’d be with friends, who I’d consult with before taking them back to my single, sheetless mattress in the corner of my friend’s bedroom I used to live on, and most of the times, they’d hype her up and tell me she was good to go and that if I backed out now, I was faggot. So I’d go home, I’d do whatever it is I’d do to them, and I’d wake up only to realize that all that hype was fucking lies, and that my friends weren’t really friends at all…they just wanted me to go home with the girl with one-eye, or the girl with a patch of green fungus on her cheek and a variety of other seriously disgusting shit I would have hated myself for, if I didn’t hate myself already and think the whole thing was funny.

What I am trying to say is, this bitch is all hype, there’s nothing about her that warrants me or anyone else talking about her, sure she’s skinny and has a big Julia Roberts mouth you can shove your fist in while fucking her up the ass, but everything else about her fuckin’ sucks, especially the fact that she thinks she’s fucking famous. I hate her….

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Annalynne McCord|Ugly