In case you were wondering where Alessandra Ambrosio was, and I know you were, because you are weird and you wonder about these bitches when you’re not masturbating to them, since your life fucking sucks…She’s in Greece and that doesn’t mean she does it Greek, but having a couple kids probably means she does, because even the biggest vagina misses the tightness their wife once had before making the stupid decision to have kids…a vagina that is luckily wrapped up in her bikini so we can focus on her amazing baby momma recover…rather than that fleshy womb hanging halfway down her thigh, as most mom pussies work….

TO SEE THE BIKINI PICS CLICK HERE

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The best thing about a model, especially a bikini model, in a bikini, is that she does it so well, I mean that’s why she gets paid all that money to do it…

The worst thing about a model, especially a bikini model, in a bikini, is that she’s on the beach with her kids, reminding me that under those bikini bottoms she’s wearing for free, is a ravaged mom vagina, that isn’t all that tight…cuz no kegels can really restore a vagina to it’s original form despite what moms will tell you, as no girls, not even those who bang black cocks, ever want to admit their junk is stretched out like a animal pelt being turned into a pair of fine italian shoes…

I don’t know what that means, but it made sense at the time I wrote it. What I do know is that this is the bikini model equivalent a dentist doing free dental work for homeless people, or some doctors doing doctors without border, or some lawyer helping out some ghetto mom on welfare for free…you know some community, pro-boner shit, only the bikini model’s more about the pro-boner than about actually helping anyone with her “life work” of standing around lookin’ pretty…a contribution to society, one could argue is not quite a contribution.

To see the rest of the pics CLICK HERE

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Alessandra Ambrosio must be on her period, you know feeling a little bloated, or maybe she’s on vacation and hasn’t been working out, getting soft….or even worse, maybe she’s all pregnant again, broadcasting to the world that she doesn’t care about her vagina, she wants to shred that shit, even though it’s critical in making her money in the tail end of her modeling career….or maybe, she’s decided to take up competitive swimming and this is her uniform, because that is the only acceptable way to justify the one piece…I mean at least for a fucking lingerie model, who should be half naked, while the other moms, who should be in a one piece are in a bikini. What does it all mean? Where did it all go wrong?

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In case you were wondering, Alessandra Ambrosio, unlike the girl I saw at the Airport in a Wheelchair….has LEGS….

Legs that I would love to wear as a scarf, you know so that mom pussy acts as a gas mask for me to try to breathe into…even if it is so far dead and a lost cause…I am willing to try…I have hope…because unlike other mom pussy this one’s ass has bounced back from the pregnancy…and that is good enough.

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Alessandra Ambrosio is so bendy she can suck her own dick, I mean provided she had a dick, and wasn’t a top lingerie model with a couple of kids, who like so many other women, just do yoga, which happens to be porn to me, and can touch their fucking toes with their faces, in ways that shit is erotic and exotic and unhuman, especially married to a woman who can’t even wipe her own ass….

All making me question my existence, my choices and why I’m not in a Yoga class right now, daily, with all the moms trying as hard as they can to stay sexy. Not because they have million dollar modeling contracts like this one, but because they can’t live with the idea of losing their sex appeal while their husbands are fucking the maid, nanny, secretary, young and eager new sales girl on the team, etc. or more importantly, with all the 20 somethings, who just want to look good in leggings and choose yoga as their outlet…

I’m too lazy, so I’ll just look at pics rather than actually living it….good enough for me..and my lifestyle choices.

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Unlike you, Alessandra Ambrosio gets paid to prance around in her bikini….so you’d think looking at pics of her in a bikini would be uneventful, typical, even boring….because we’ve seen it all before…but I like to think of it as watching a great juggling act more than once…or listening to guy playing the same guitar solo on repeat….only the bikini version…

Sure it’s familiar…it has been done….but it just speaks to your soul like a magical angel sent from heaven to watch over….more importantly….it offers us a baseline to compare the women in our lives to….to feel inadequate….but content knowing that this kind of mom body exists…even if the closest we will get to it is masturbating to it….

She’s a babe….she’s in a bikini….she’s getting paid…and we’re all assholes for celebrating it like it matters…but I’ll still celebrate it like it matters….cuz I have nothing else going on.

Here’s the video…

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There is something totally erotic about a girl…or a model…nude in her raincoat….like some kind of creepy flasher outside the playground….only way thinner, more luxurious, classy and with less cock….

Alessandra Ambrosio, a lingerie model by trade, is the spokesperson for London Fog…and she brings a nice amount of that half naked sexiness to the mix…but maybe…just maybe I’m a pervert who finds anything with a vagina…even just an alleged vagina….exciting….even when passed out and covered in feces……

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