Joel Madden Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

Archive for the Joel Madden Category

2008

Sep

I was Right About the Good Charlotte Sisters of the Day

I have been saying that these two have been fucking since they were in the womb and dating girls is just a distraction from the fact that they can’t be together, it just isn’t socially acceptable. I also defended them by saying they aren’t fags for wanting each other’s dicks, because they are identical twins, so it’s like masturbation, but the truth is that masturbation or not, they just can’t get married to each other like they want to and sometimes that truth too hard to accept that they slip up in public and here is the picture. But in their defense, if you were the idiots who were dating Paris and Nicole…a pile of dog shit would start to look like a good fuck.

Here is one of the Good Charlotte Sisters out with Paris Hilton and someone who has Aids, who I guess has decided to start showing her bird face again, but is wearing her Center for Disease control issued condom pants so that she doesn’t spread her shitty vagina sauce all over public places like it was peanut butter and the world was one giant piece of toast. You know like chairs in restaurants, public washrooms and anything else her vagina could possibly touch as it hangs out of whatever pantyless outfit she’s wearing.

Posted in:Benji Madden|Joel Madden|Paris Hilton

2007

Sep

I am – Nicole Richie Leaves Town of the Day

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Here are some pictures of a pregnant Nicole Richie leaving town with her lame as fuck baby daddy, provided the baby makes it out of the womb alive. I assume that she’s had so much dick in her that her small frame’s got some big vagina and I wouldn’t be surprised if the baby’s already fallen out and into the toilet when she’s taking a shit forcing her to push it all back in place and using hair elastics to lock it all into place….so that it has a semi-normal development.

Reality is that someone like Joel Madden doesn’t deserve to get a girl pregnant, even if it’s someone as useless to the world a Nicole Richie. He is the kind of guy who girls double up their birth control with, so that they don’t have to be stuck to him for life because even they know how fucking lame he is. I can only assume that this motherfucker sabotaged her pill and ripped his condom tip to make this shit happen, knowing very well that Nicole’s numerous botched abortions from her past made getting another one impossible.

Speaking of Nicole Richie’s Vagina…DJ AM has been ignoring my emails for the last 2 years, so I sent him this one:

why you gotta ignore me…
don’t be so fucking sensitive
it breaks my heart to think i’ve hurt your feelings
or annoyed you…
i heard you hate me…
i don’t get why…
it’s totally unecessary
I feel like were’ in elementary school
and I’ve been stealing your lunch money for a month or some shit and your mom just called the school to complain..

lighten the fuck up

love

jesus

He finally responded for the first time in 2 years….

I dont hate you at all! I just think your corny and stalkerish… 🙂

So I wrote him asking him to play my stepFEST Tour, which doesn’t exist but it could…

would you play a DrunkenStepfather party for me?

And he wrote back :

no.. read your review.. Im “gay and suck and shouldn’t DJ” or something like that lol

That’s as close as I get to someone in LA who banged Nicole Richie and now I am sharing it with you. But the good news is that he’s been getting my emails all these years, he’s just been ignoring them….so it goes to show you that my constant harassing actually got through to him so my mom was right, hard work does pay off…too bad this gets me pretty much nothing…but that’s all I expect from myself….because I suck at life.

Related Posts:

Nicole Richie Pregnancy Tits
Nicole Richie’s Sheer Maternity Top
Nicole RIchie’s Pregnant Guy
The Reason DJ AM Thinks I am a Stalker – stepTV