I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

Archive for the Pinch Category

2009

05

Jan

Tila Tequila and her Sluts Get Coffee of the Day

Tila Tequila brought her big fake tits out to get coffee with her really fucking ugly girlfriend and they had a long conversation with these paparazzi. I guess when you’re a useless nobody fame whore, you gotta take all the attention you can get and it gave the paparazzi the chance to let out their comedian fuckin’ roots. When Tila’s tits and her girlfriends weak chin and teeth were sitting having a coffee, these fuckers decided to simulate the useless conversation they were probably having and I laughed, because after hearing the build-up as they walked to get coffee, I realized how much of a waste of fucking space these whores are. They have nothing to offer the world, but for some reason all of them are rich and I guess my New Year’s Resolution should be to get fake tits, to dumb down my shit and to talk about slutty things I do and keep things on as sexual of a kick as I can, because then, maybe I’ll be able to buy that Villa in the Caribbean I’ve always wanted, or in Tila’s girlfriend’s case, I just need a really rich father to feel sorry for bringing such a weird lookin creature into the world, so ugly that the only way he can live with the guilt of doing that to another person, is to send checks on the weekly, which luckily keeps the beast as far away from home as possible, so that he doesn’t have to cart her around and introduce her to his friends so that they don’t have evidence of how inadequate your sperm is as it’s product smiles with it’s big teeth and weak chin in their face. It’s better to have her in the tabloids and tell people she’s adopted because when you saw her at the orphanage, you reflected on your success and figured it’d be nice to give back to the world by saving an ugly baby no one wants, and that lie is hard to play out when she’s by your fuckin’ side, because when your daddy doesn’t want to admit you’re his, it causes issues, resentment and lesbianism….I guess it’s all starting to make sense now.

Posted in:Lesbian|Pinch|Tila Tequila