I went on a walk to get away from my wife earlier tonight and I found myself walking into a construction site without realizing it because the fuckers had the sidewalked blocked off like people didn’t need to use that shit or something and in protest of them being assholes who inconvenience me, I decided to walk through the site. Nothing was going to stop me, until I almost got run the fuck over by a bulldozer and the first thing that came to my mind was Hayden? Why you trying to hurt me.
Lucky for you, I escaped unscathed, but I almost got in a fist fight with the construction worker who was driving the bulldozer, because I told him that just because he’s a highschool drop out doesn’t mean he has to take out his rage that life didn’t work out for him on me. He didn’t take it well and got in my face, he definitely would have beat the fuck out of me, because he spends his days lifting heavy things and had bigger arms than Hayden, while I spend my days sitting and recovering from hangovers and was already out of breath from trying to walk….but I made things good with Hayden by telling him that I dropped out of high school too, we high fived and I am almost feel over, then I went on with my life and he went back to his bulldozer that I also named Hayden.
Either way, here is the star of my construction working experience where she played both the bulldozer and the burly construction working dude at the same time and now she’s wearing some ironic T-shirt….what can’t this beast do, she’s gotta be a machine and not just because she’s built like one. If you’re wondering why her shirt is ironic, it’s because I saw the movie and it was about some ugly fat girl who wanted to be a beauty queen, and Hayden is an ugly girl who thinks she’s a beauty queen, it’s be like me wearing a shirt that said, Fat, Mexican, Poor and Limp….but different.