I don’t really know what’s going on here with all the bikini content, I guess it could be because it’s winter vacation and I am definitely not complaining. If I was a celebrity I would be in a bikini all the time, but obviously not my own, if you know what I mean. That was example of a shitty play on words that didn’t really convert as solid as I would like it to. I was walking around a drug store because I needed to buy toilet paper, there are some things in life you have no choice but to spend your non existent money on, especially when your wife loves eating, if you know what I mean. If you don’t, I’ll make it pretty fucking clear, when she has to shit, it’s a fucking process, and for anyone familiar with the site, you know I don’t like talking about shit, but this is too fucking crazy to ignore….anyway, she waddles her fat ass in there and has to get me to undress her….she barely fits between the wall and the bathtub and when she’s seated you can’t even see she’s on a fucking toilet, it’s like the thing got sucked up in her or something….after about 25 minutes, I have to come in and clean up, you know flush and wipe her and the toilet down, her aim is a a little off and the smell is something I wish upon no one…That said, I was at the drug store and I saw these two 20 year old girls buying condoms, I looked at them, they looked at me and the next thing I know, security is there asking me to leave….

Jessica Alba is a lot like those girls in the Pharmacy. They weren’t all that hot, one of them had football shoulders but the fact that they fucked made me happy, even though condom’s are for pussies. I like the way this post came out, from Shit to Condoms to Sexual Harassment To Complimenting myself. Amazing.

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My site gets worse and worse by the day. I used to feature freaks and perverts and whores who wrestle and now all I do is post celebrities in bikinis. I got an email the other day calling me a sellout for turning this into a celebrity blog, she went on to say that I am a fag like Perez and tried to rip into me for posting only celeb content. My answer to her is that Ashlee Simpson isn’t a real celebrity, she’s just a whore who wrestles in disguise and her dad is the freak and pervert….You see, I can talk about the underbelly and the sleaze of the world set to pictures of famous people because they may make money and they may be on TV and dropping garbage albums, but their daddy’s still touch them inappropriately, and they still let their hispanic boyfriends take their ass cherry. So fuck yourself for trying to dis what I do. The real underbelly of the world is these people and your stupid obsession with them.

That said…Ashlee’s got some love handle and a flat ass, a little too dumpy for me. I do like anorexic girls because their negative self-image and their self-destructive eating habits give me a fucking boner and I’m fucking impotent. Maybe it’s cuz my fat wife is on the other end of the spectrum and she makes me sick to my stomach when I have to powder her thighs. I know I talk about my impotency and my fat wife a lot but it is a little consuming. I was out yesterday and this bitch in tights, with legs as thick as her fucking ankles walked by me, at first I thought she was Asian or naturally skinny but realized she was Jewish and knew she wasn’t just skinny, she was anorexic or like I like to call them, the real skinny because they work so hard to be skinny. I guess I just like someone with a good work ethic. Cuddles.

These Pics are Shit Quality…Which is Appropriate Since Ashlee is a Pretty Shitty Quality Talent.

Here’s some Ashlee Simpson Bikini Collages…

Collage 1
Collage 2

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I don’t know where Lohan is finding her entourage these days but they are pretty busted but at least she’s wearing a bikini when she’s doing it. I just hope she isn’t banging no chin cuz that would definitely fuck up my game. I can never bang a chick when I see the trash she’s fucked in the past, but only because I am impotent and not because I have standards, because I don’t.

I don’t really have much more to say about this because it is 4 in the morning and I am drunk. So here are her pics.

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I don’t understand why my site sucked so fucking hard today, but I guess it’s to be expected when working on a budget. I had a benedryl hangover all day and it was fucking weird. The whole day felt like a dream, but not the good kind of dream where you’re getting a blowjob and end up waking up with a mess all over yourself…not that I would know, when I could get it up, I jerked off so much that I never had a reserve to blow in my sleep. True Fucking Story. I found a really sexy store in the seedy part of town and I can get my girls some sequined low cut shirt/pant/cat suit thing. It was made out of rayon for $8.99, now all I need to do is make some money to make their dreams come true, and by their dreams I mean my dreams.. Click the fucking links. Asshole.

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Is watching handjob porn gay? Most of the time it’s just a hand and a penis and I guess you can make it what you want to make it, but a lot of guys I know watch it and love it. I don’t get hard so I can only assume that they like it because it makes the fantasy easier to visualize, you can pretend that you are the person in the video getting a hand job from a hot chick and not the cunt virgin loser jerking off in your mom’s basement while she is out getting groceries that you are….

Fantasies are nice because it’s nice to get away from reality for a few minute before sinning all over your belly, and here’s one of those fantasies almost coming true. In 2000 everyone wanted to fuck the Olsen twins, in 2007, they finally show a little nipple. They are billionaires so the chances of seeing their cunts is slim to none, but a little nipple’s better than a kick in the face.

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My site is getting hit fucking hard with traffic or something cuz it’s running like it was the product of a Father and Daughter having a baby, even though Dr. Phil says that incest doesn’t breed flipper babies and that that is just an old wife’s tale used to scare people off from fucking family, because let’s face it, it’s really accessible. I suggest you test the theory out at home and make your family proud by crawling into bed with your sister tonight, naked and hard…I’m sure it’ll go over well….

Speaking of making your family proud, here are some recent pics of that slut Ashlee Simpson showing the world her titty. I’d say that she did this for daddy Joe, a celebrity father/manager known for turning his girls into “sex symbols” because he was bored of them being sex symbols for him in the privacy of his own home, because even Cindy Crawford’s husband gets bored of her pussy, and Daddy Joe figured he could make decent money off of them…he was right, but this picture isn’t hardcore enough for him, he’s more into the pussy shots.

On a side note, my site is blocked in all schools and corporate offices around the world, that is why no one reads it. It’s got nothing to do with my shitty writing, I promise and I would get a better server, if this site made me enough money to pay for a better server…That’s your cue to send me money asshole. This post took me an hour to upload…

Either way, here’s that nipple.

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My site is getting hit fucking hard with traffic or something cuz it’s running like it was the product of a Father and Daughter having a baby, even though Dr. Phil says that incest doesn’t breed flipper babies and that that is just an old wife’s tale used to scare people off from fucking family, because let’s face it, it’s really accessible. I suggest you test the theory out at home and make your family proud by crawling into bed with your sister tonight, naked and hard…I’m sure it’ll go over well….

Speaking of making your family proud, here are some recent pics of that slut Ashlee Simpson showing the world her titty. I’d say that she did this for daddy Joe, a celebrity father/manager known for turning his girls into “sex symbols” because he was bored of them being sex symbols for him in the privacy of his own home, because even Cindy Crawford’s husband gets bored of her pussy, and Daddy Joe figured he could make decent money off of them…he was right, but this picture isn’t hardcore enough for him, he’s more into the pussy shots.

On a side note, my site is blocked in all schools and corporate offices around the world, that is why no one reads it. It’s got nothing to do with my shitty writing, I promise and I would get a better server, if this site made me enough money to pay for a better server…That’s your cue to send me money asshole. This post took me an hour to upload…

Either way, here’s that nipple.

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I am not really a looker and that’s okay. I don’t expect the general population to be attractive, but I do expect someone hanging out with Lohan to have a fucking chin and if that motherfucker doesn’t have a fucking chin, I expect him to have enough fucking money to buy himself a fucking chin. I met a girl once who worked in a strip club, she was a cuban and had fake tits but didn’t strip. She had a weak chin and it fucked her game, she had everything else going for her. When we would get in fights and she’d call me a fat slob, I’d turn it around and make fun of her chin. That cuban who worked in a strip club but not as a stripper got her new chin and I’d like you to know she’s beautiful now. So there’s no excuse for Lohan’s ugly friends to not do the same motherfucking thing…but then again what do I know, I just write a shitty website. Cuddles.

PS – Lohan may look like a haggard, washed up piece of shit hooker, but I still wouldn’t kick her out of bed for having a herpes outbreak…and her tits could be my friends. I’d take them out to the park with me and drink 40s with them and smoke cheap cigars with them, but that’s not saying much, I’d probably do that with anyone’s tits….Either way, here are them there pics.

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I am not really a looker and that’s okay. I don’t expect the general population to be attractive, but I do expect someone hanging out with Lohan to have a fucking chin and if that motherfucker doesn’t have a fucking chin, I expect him to have enough fucking money to buy himself a fucking chin. I met a girl once who worked in a strip club, she was a cuban and had fake tits but didn’t strip. She had a weak chin and it fucked her game, she had everything else going for her. When we would get in fights and she’d call me a fat slob, I’d turn it around and make fun of her chin. That cuban who worked in a strip club but not as a stripper got her new chin and I’d like you to know she’s beautiful now. So there’s no excuse for Lohan’s ugly friends to not do the same motherfucking thing…but then again what do I know, I just write a shitty website. Cuddles.

PS – Lohan may look like a haggard, washed up piece of shit hooker, but I still wouldn’t kick her out of bed for having a herpes outbreak…and her tits could be my friends. I’d take them out to the park with me and drink 40s with them and smoke cheap cigars with them, but that’s not saying much, I’d probably do that with anyone’s tits….Either way, here are them there pics.

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I feel hungover and I took down my luxurious designer Christmas tree that some bitch in a Range Rover who reads this site gave me after I tried to steal it from her, but got caught cuz I suck at most things I do even stealing Christmas trees. We forgot to water the fucker and the whole back of it was yellow, I couldn’t fit it through my window so I decided to put it in a garbage back…the shit was too big for a garbage bag so I took one of my wife’s dresses, cuz they are big because she is big and tried to wrap it in that…still no luck. I spent 3 hours wrestling with the fucking thing, and ended up using duct tape I had lying around, wrapped it up and moved it out. Now the floor is covered in pine needles like I live in the fucking forest, which would explain the smell of shit that seems to never go away, we found out it was from my wife’s rash….When outside I saw some dude in a fur coat, walking a designer dog, obviously a fag in his 60’s who thought he was fabulous, until I saw him fishing through the garbage checking out some old VCR someone threw out…I guess he wasn’t a fag, he was just insane….

Speaking of insane here are my stepLINKS, Click Them….

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