My favorite thing about weddings other than getting invited to them, because I am a bit of a liability, is treating open bar like a personal challenge to see if I can drink them dry, but I don’t mind all the horny single girls jealous of their married friend finding love, all jacked up with […]

I’ve spent the better part of the night trying to convince a girl to cheat on her boyfriend with me, he’s out of town…I thought the winning move was when I promised her that I wouldn’t leave a mark…but turns out some girls, aren’t into cheating on their boyfriends with me, they probably save the […]

The highlight of LA so far is that everyone wants to be famous, at least the girls, and in wanting to be famous, they are all sluts about it but more importantly, they aren’t fat… So if you are into lying to girls, telling them you’re a producer, or a famous blogger, who can help […]

I don’t send dick pics or pics of me cumming over Snap Chat like you people of the future, but rather I mail it. I’m old fashioned like that. There’s just something special about being able to touch it 6-12 days later… PS – this may be footage of a Florida UFO because all great […]

The highlight of the weekend wasn’t sneaking backstage at a music festival…because security are fucking annoying and I don’t care about Macklemore and his gay friendly commercial music… The highlight of the weekend was being backstage and trying to convince girls that I was someone important after drinking all the free booze I could…you know […]

I accidentally met fat chicks who care more about my site than I do. In fact they cared so much about it that they followed me around for over an hour yelling at me about how horrible it is and how mean I am to women. How I am a loser and how I am […]

I really really really really like watching girls work out….whether it is yoga or jogging or doing squats or really anything… It is probably because fit girls aren’t fat girls and fat girls are the enemy… But maybe a healthy bitch just radiates a tight ass I want to eat… I was creeping on Yoga […]

I like revisiting landmarks where I have had sex with strangers from the internet months later to see if I can find any remnants of our encounter…not like a used condom or anything…I don’t use those…just something a little more magical…like the body. 🙂 I’m such a joker…the only thing that dies when a girl […]

Telling a girl you’re DrunkenStepfather and you follow her on instagram when you run into her at a bar, coffee shop, the park, probably won’t get you laid, if you’re lucky, it also won’t get the police called, because let’s face it, not everyone, especially hot girls I stare at on Instragram, are not always […]

I like that Precious is the witness in the trayvon martin case. What can’t the fat thing do? Oh right, push ups. I like that a girl in the park tanning in a bikini had a tattoo with script across her chest so that when she caught me staring at her tits, I said “I’m […]