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Archive for the Mariah Carey Category

2013

19

Jun

Mariah Carey Bikini for the Internet of the Day

Mariah Carey did this photoshoot in her bikini that she posted to the internet because no one told her that she’s 100 fucking years old.

The good news is that the end result looks like some cheesy fucking shoot that took place back on a Miami spring break party in the 90s, or for the high school yearbook shit, with masterful graphic design shit, you know when she wasn’t 100 fucking years old…almost tricking me into thinking it was taken back when she mattered…before a bunch of kids…

Posted in:Mariah Carey

2013

18

Jun

Mariah Carey is on a Boat in a Bikini of the Day

Mariah Carey was on a boat, and despite what the date her birth certificate suggests….she got into a bikini…

I wonder if this is another example of her manic episodes that I thought Nick Cannon and their twins helped get under control…

Or maybe, this is all thanks to the meds making her feel good about herself, and at the top of her game and sex appeal, even though pushing 40 usually requires a little more of a one-piece…or even an 1890s style swimming outfit…

Luckily for her, all I see is titties in a white bikini, and that shit excites me proper.


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Posted in:Mariah Carey

2013

06

Jun

Mariah Carey Too Old for This Outfit of the Day

3 Days ago, Mariah Carey felt that she wasn’t too old, or chubby to attend some Hot 97 concert event wearing this outfit, and thank god for that.

Sure I may be late on this, but I blame not giving a fuck about the whereabouts or doings of Mariah Carey.

I mean she’s pushing 40, she’s happily married and a mom, she’s just not in my wheelhouse of things I bother paying attention to…

But sometimes, like a homeless person you normally ignore, trying to poke you with an AIDS syringe at the bank machine, the people who are in the woodwork, manage to find a way out….

Here’s the video….


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Posted in:Mariah Carey

2013

10

May

Mariah Carey’s Motorcycle Erotica of the Day

I have heard that older chicks love riding motorbikes because they make them cum. All the machinery, adrenaline, vibrations just hit their tired vaginas better than any man could, you know since it’s some massive hitachi magic wand, with more than just a plug in, with it’s massive engine….but usually biker chicks are disgusting, and the idea of their soaked through panties disgusts me, you know because their tattooed up, white trash tattoos scare me….

But for some reason, seeing mom Mariah making a comeback in her 40s, like she was 20, dressed in skimpy clothes, doing twerks, simulating orgasm and grinding up on the motorbike, isn’t as fat or aggressive as I’d think, and she’s actually lookin’ hot…and that just weirds me out.

Posted in:Mariah Carey

2013

16

Apr

Mariah Carey Blowdrying Her Hair Porn of the Day

Here’s a new fetish of mine – Mariah Carey in a tight dress pretending to do her own hair, even though you know this high maintenance diva has a hair stylist on staff and never leaves the house without her, because that’s just the way celebrities are.

But I guess it’s nice to pretend, I do it every time I have sex with my wife, you know by pretending it isn’t happening, or pretending that smell is just the garbage I forgot to bring out, filled with rotting meat and not unhygienic pussy I’m at least an inch deep in….

Either way, here’s the pic

Posted in:Mariah Carey

2013

03

Apr

Mariah Carey is a Mermaid Sent from Heaven of the Day

I’d say Mariah Carey is a mystical creature sent from heaven with a voice of an angel designed to save the fucking world, but I’m only posting these pics cuz that booty, mom of 2 pushing 50, is fat and stuffed into a tight dress like a sausage, or my penis in a beer bottle, and for some reason I find it mesmerizing.

Sure she was better in her bi-polar suicide insanity, cuz insane girls fuck better, but when it comes to Mariah Carey, I’ll take whatever I get….and usually ignore it…except for today…today…I’m down.

Posted in:Mariah Carey

2012

28

Nov

Mariah Carey Tits for X-Mas of the Day

Tis the fucking season for fat chicks singing with their tits hanging out for the birth of our lord and savior Jesus Christ…where we are encouraged to spend our money and get in debt and do all things totally unchristian for Christmas….like masturbate to this harlot as people make amazing commentary to her performance……

I love the Holidays….Seriously….

Posted in:Mariah Carey

2012

26

Jul

Mariah Cary’s Promo Pic for Idol is Amazing of the Day

Mariah Carey is the new America Idol judge and this is the photoshopped masterpiece that reminds me a bit of Toddlers in Tiaras and a bit of a drag show and a bit of a wax museum exhibit because let’s face it…this is up on some serious clown shit….and I love it….

The real question is how American Idol is still on TV after all these years of failure…but I am hoping Mariah Carey is the final nail in the coffin….sometimes sinking ships are fun to watch….

Posted in:Mariah Carey

2012

30

Apr

Mariah Carey’s Insane Mom Cameltoe of the Day

When I think of childbirth…and the affects of childbirth….you know something I sum up as “mom pussy”…..this is kinda what it looks like in my mind…and thanks to Mariah Carey, I can really get a visual of all I knew existed but pretended didn’t exist cuz the moms I know in tight pants are the fit ones smart enough to not jack their shit up this hard showing the world a long, drawn out, meaty and obscure entity that is better left in loose fitting pants…..I don’t know if this is gross enough to make me sick or if I should try to jerk off to it as challenge to my desensitized self…but I do know it’s representative of all things wrong with the marriage between birthing and spandex……enjoy..


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Posted in:Mariah Carey