This is like the time my friend Pavlos decided to get Laser Eye Surgery. The government offered to pay for him because it had something to do with the welfare program he was on. It was supposed to make him more hireable. He was scared of the concept, being a poor immigrant from Romania, he had no idea what Lasik was. He agreed to get it done, but the place gave him the option of doing one eye at a time, to see how it works and how it heals, and if the surgery is botched you’ll alwyas have one eye and all that shit. Victoria Beckham did the same thing, but the Tit version. I guess she wanted to test out cleavage to make sure these were the size for her or some shit. That’s the story I heard.

Bonus:

Taking Animal Print Fashion Advice from Beckham’s Tit, Brooke Hogan Keeps the State of Florida Proud by Remaining a Piece of White Stripper-lookin’ Trash…

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